4.22.2006

bux blocker

i am not fond of the customers who think i was born with a green apron and put on this planet just to serve them.
i really hate it when there are eight other customers behind them.
this afternoon we were short handed and there were only two partners for about an hour and a half. i put myself on register since i'm decidedly cheerier than my fellow barista buddy. half an hour into our short-handed shift and all was well, that is all was well until high maintenance trophy wife stepped up to order.

"i want one of those sugar free frappuccinos," she told me. i, in turn, informed her that although the sugar content is reduced in a frappuccino light, they are not sugar free. "i know one has sugar. give me the one without sugar," was her response.
so, after another lengthy explanation about frappuccinos with or without sugar, trophy wife decides to order a hot drink.
"well, just give me one of the hot mochas. but i want that one sugar free as well."
"we only have sugar free vanilla or sugar free hazelnut syrup. i can make the mocha with nonfat milk but i can't make it sugar free."
meanwhile the line was getting longer behind our high maintenance "guest".
"whatever, just make me a drink with chocolate that is sugar free," she says then walks over to the pastry case.
"our sugar free chocolate tastes like vanilla," i told her as to avoid another lengthy explanation and handed the cup to my fellow barista.
"whatever," she said again. "um, which cupcake is better?" she asked as she adjusted her underwire.
cut to the line growing even longer!
"they all taste exactly the same," i lied, just to speed up the process.
"maybe i'll get one of these mini loafs. what does the lemon one taste like?"
"um, i think it tastes like lemon," was my sarcastic response. too bad she didn't pick up on my snotty tone.
"i like lemon. let me have the lemon one."

i finally was able to ring her up, swipe her credit card and bid good riddance. unfortunately, just as i started to help the next customer, trophy wife comes back to me.
"this is too lemony. give me the cupcake instead."
i grabbed a cupcake, stuffed it in a bag and practically tossed it to her.
"can i have a fork, too?" she asked, totally ignorant of the evil eyes i was giving her.

i tell ya, i know i'm going to lose my barista title one day for going off on a customer like her. i can just feel it.

partner rant: bux! are you kidding me? how many more syrups and sauces are you going to make us stock? what happened to the good old days when we only had brownie bits at the cold beverage station? now its java chips, vanilla bean powder, malt powder, matcha powder, strawberry sauce, blackberry sauce and an abundance of syrups! and now you're adding banana sauce and coconut syrup? you have effectively added twenty minutes to our closing time because of all the added containers we must wash and stock. and then our district managers tell us our cold beverage station looks "cluttered" and "messy". they only have you to blame, bux. only you.

6 comments:

Sling said...

Conversely,I had a customer at the bar that wanted a strawberry/banana daquiri..."But DON'T make it sweet"...

Benny said...

Too bad Trophy Wife wasn't in line before Saintly Mother. I can just hear her (or someone like her) pre-empting the bratty daughter's ungratefulness with something like, "Now that's exactly how you'd better never behave if you want to make something of yourself."

Speaking of which, have you caught any of Housewives of Orange County? My eyes are bulging after three minutes.

Alex said...

All I can say is thank god i've never encountered 'high maintenance trophy wife.'

guerrilla blogger said...

you get live free theater every day, *AND* you get paid for it...lucky....

barista brat said...

sling - i love it - a manly version version of a girly drink

b - i totally thought she was one of those orange county hausfraus. yeah, those women are...well...useless.

alex - but you did get annoying mom who hates kids and kids toys!

guerilla - it's true, and i can't help thinking "monkeys like tapping on glass" each time i see someone at the pastry case.

Alex said...

lol true