gems from this weekend:
- "hey which gum flavor is best? i'm gonna take some ecstasy tonight and i want something that will go well with it."
- "i need to return this espresso brownie because you didn't tell me there was coffee in it! yeah, i know it's called an espresso brownie, but how was i supposed to know it was made with coffee!"
- "you don't sell scoops of ice cream? why not? the store next door does!"
- "i heard coffee's a diuretic so i want a frappuccino without caffeine. i'm going to the movies and i don't want to have diarrhea during the film."
- "do any of your syrups act like aphrodisiacs?"
- "i spent all my money at the bagel place, but i really want a latte. can i pay you later? oh, and i want to get one for my wife and my brother. can you spot me until tomorrow?"
- "my dad owns starbucks stock. do i get a discount?"
- "i bought a pound of beans to make coffee at home, but i didn't like the way it tasted. i threw it out, but i still have the receipt. can i get my money back?"
- "what do you mean you don't have anymore gingerbread syrup? i don't care that it's summertime! you should carry it all year round!"
- "how many calories does your sugar-free vanilla have?"
partner rant: dude, you're supposed to be an assistant manager. so why do i have to fix everything you do - even the most simple of tasks. how can you be earning the big bucks and still mess up everything you touch? because of your mistake we brewed caffeinated coffee, but told our customers it was decaf. because of your stupidity two people got free drinks. because of your inability to manage time you turned over the worst shift i've ever seen. and because you're such a coward you allowed a customer to verbally abuse one of my fellow baristas. you need to be demoted. and your pay needs to be cut.