i love working for bux, i really do. i can't think of any other part-time job that gives you benefits, grants you stock and gives paid time off for vacation.
so, when my friend was hired at a bux near me i was happy for him. but that all changed very quickly. you see, not all bux are created equal.
my friend had the unfortunate experience of going to a sucky bux. the kind where the employees are cranky, the manager is clueless and ethics don't exist.
not only did they improperly train him (and mind you, bux has spent a lot of money developing and creating training manuals and techniques that ALL stores are to use), his assistant manager tried to get him to sign a piece of paper stating he will not be a barista but a janitor.
oh yeah, you read that right.
they want him to do floor runs, take the trash out, clean drains and scrub the toilets. and they want him to sign his name agreeing to it!
for anyone who might not know - there is NO such janitor position in bux. everyone is a barista and every barista should do floor runs, take the trash out, clean drains and scrub the toilets. i do it, managers worth their salt do it, newbies do it - basically, everyone in a green apron does it.
not only do baristas clean, they prep, they make drinks and they serve customers. because my friend's bux is a sucky bux, they've decided to make up their own rules and regulations. because my friend is new and not part of their particular clique, they are trying to get him to do all the grunt work.
apparenlty he's got a meeting with the store manager next week. it could be a sit down discussion in which his progress is discussed, or it could be just a formality for when they hand him his final paycheck. if it's the latter, i've already well informed him that what he's experience is NOT standard and i've given him a course of action to follow in case they try to fire him.
the tragedy is this guy was really keen to work for bux. now, of course, he's sour on the experience. but the real loser is bux. not only do they have idiots running one of their stores, their reputation as a great employer is being ruined by the likes of these idiots.
customer rant: i know working with friends is fun. i know joking around is fun. but please remember that customers don't come to bux to hear you shout, shriek or scream. we are here to relax and chat with friends over a cup of coffee. we do not want our conversations, our book reading, our paper writing to be interrupted multiple times by the baristas shouting dumb jokes to one another. this is the customers' third place, not your house party - ok?
7.12.2006
7.10.2006
brat moves bux!
today i won't rant about my bux.
nope.
you won't hear me complaining about the fact that my store is literally falling apart, how the schedule STILL is in desperate need of a skillful eye, how the newbies seem to be floundering instead of flourishing, how our orders still are inadequate, how we don't have enough management staff, how the best managements staff are gone/leaving, how all around the backroom there are stupid little notes left from my manager to "inspire" us baristas to work harder and sell more.
no, i will not be complaining about my bux because in just a matter of weeks i will have a new bux to complain about - uh, i mean discuss.
that is correct! barista brat has found a new bux to hang her apron at.
you might wonder if it was the manager, crappy ordering, poorly designed store, or lazy newbies that prompted the move - and yes, you would be correct.
but, oh, it's so much deeper than that!
my bux was once so wonderful to work at. even though a team of chimpanzees could have designed a better floorplan, it was hardly bothersome because we had a crew that all got along and ran like clockwork, a manager that really knew how to manage, and great loyal customers.
it's not as if all that is gone now, but a lot of it is. and the parts that aren't missing only happen about 40% of the time. i found myself loathing the hour i'd have to begin my shift, and that's never happened to me before at bux. i realized it was just time for me to move on because it was so depressing to come to work everyday and see what a mess it had become when once it was so grand.
so, it will be fun to embark on a new bux adventure with all of you. i know my new bux isn't perfect (part of the reason why they're sending me there - because i'm a bomb ass barista!) and i'm sure i will have plenty to rant about. i still have a couple weeks left at my current bux, but already i'm not hating going to work everyday because i know i will soon be out of there.
i just hope it doesn't turn out to be worse than my current bux!
customer rant: your pastry case was leaking water. i figured i'd just let you know since it wouldn't be pretty if a customer slipped and fell in the large puddle that had formed. so why the attitude when i pointed the leak out to you? why the heavy sigh followed by a "we know ALREADY!". if you knew ALREADY, why didn't you mop up the water? why didn't you put towels down to stop the leak? why wasn't your 'wet floor' sign out? excuse me for trying to be helpful. it's obvious that you ALREADY don't care.
nope.
you won't hear me complaining about the fact that my store is literally falling apart, how the schedule STILL is in desperate need of a skillful eye, how the newbies seem to be floundering instead of flourishing, how our orders still are inadequate, how we don't have enough management staff, how the best managements staff are gone/leaving, how all around the backroom there are stupid little notes left from my manager to "inspire" us baristas to work harder and sell more.
no, i will not be complaining about my bux because in just a matter of weeks i will have a new bux to complain about - uh, i mean discuss.
that is correct! barista brat has found a new bux to hang her apron at.
you might wonder if it was the manager, crappy ordering, poorly designed store, or lazy newbies that prompted the move - and yes, you would be correct.
but, oh, it's so much deeper than that!
my bux was once so wonderful to work at. even though a team of chimpanzees could have designed a better floorplan, it was hardly bothersome because we had a crew that all got along and ran like clockwork, a manager that really knew how to manage, and great loyal customers.
it's not as if all that is gone now, but a lot of it is. and the parts that aren't missing only happen about 40% of the time. i found myself loathing the hour i'd have to begin my shift, and that's never happened to me before at bux. i realized it was just time for me to move on because it was so depressing to come to work everyday and see what a mess it had become when once it was so grand.
so, it will be fun to embark on a new bux adventure with all of you. i know my new bux isn't perfect (part of the reason why they're sending me there - because i'm a bomb ass barista!) and i'm sure i will have plenty to rant about. i still have a couple weeks left at my current bux, but already i'm not hating going to work everyday because i know i will soon be out of there.
i just hope it doesn't turn out to be worse than my current bux!
customer rant: your pastry case was leaking water. i figured i'd just let you know since it wouldn't be pretty if a customer slipped and fell in the large puddle that had formed. so why the attitude when i pointed the leak out to you? why the heavy sigh followed by a "we know ALREADY!". if you knew ALREADY, why didn't you mop up the water? why didn't you put towels down to stop the leak? why wasn't your 'wet floor' sign out? excuse me for trying to be helpful. it's obvious that you ALREADY don't care.
7.05.2006
the scam stops here
today i had a newbie on register. right in the middle of a huge rush an older man plops a bag right on the counter and tells newbie he needs a refund.
having never done a return before, newbie asks me for help.
i can see the older man shift uncomfortably when he sees he'll be dealing with me, and not the newbie.
"i want to return these two mugs," he informs me and hands me the receipt.
now, the first thing i do when handling a return is check the date on the receipt. if the items were purchased more than 30 days before, i can only issue store credit.
so, looking at the receipt i noticed it was dated 7/05/06.
that's right. he purchased the mugs earlier in the day.
well, not exactly 'purchased'. upon closer inspection, i saw he had brought back a more expensive mug and exchanged it for the two mugs he was trying to return in my bux.
"ok," i tell newbie. "you push 'return', enter the sku for the two mugs and then total it out. now you hit the button for store credit - "
"no!" the man interrupted me. "i paid cash for them! i want cash back, not store credit! store credit is useless to me!"
"oh, i'm sorry sir, but i can only give you store credit - "
"no!" he interrupts me again. "i paid cash!"
"i'm sorry, but the receipt doesn't reflect that you paid cash. it only shows that you returned a mug and exchanged them for these two."
"well, what happened was my wife wanted a mug, so i bought one of those big ones, and then she said she wanted one with a handle, so i got her these two but i guess these are the wrong kind and she wants me to return them."
"i understand, and i would give you cash back if i could," i totally lied, but since i knew he was lying to me i didn't feel the slightest bit guilty. "but the computer system won't allow me to do that since the receipt doesn't show a cash transaction."
"well, they took my original receipt that showed i paid cash!"
"oh, well you should go back to that store. they probably still have the receipt and you can get cash back from them." i told him, knowing full well no such receipt existed.
scammer man left unhappy, and without cash in his pocket.
i then explained to newbie that a common scam is to steal a mug, take it to a bux and and exchange it for something different - then go to ANOTHER bux and try to either fool or intimidate the register partner into giving back cash.
the very sad thing is it works more often than it should, which is why the scam will continue.
customer rant: your condiment bar is right across from the registers. that means every time you ring someone up, you are facing the condiment bar. i know you're not visually impaired, so i can only assume you are failing to do your duty. why the hell is your condiment bar such a mess?!? how can you stand directly across from it and not be bothered by the trash overflowing, the granules of sugar spilled across the top, and the containers with dried milk on the side? please, do your job or quit.
having never done a return before, newbie asks me for help.
i can see the older man shift uncomfortably when he sees he'll be dealing with me, and not the newbie.
"i want to return these two mugs," he informs me and hands me the receipt.
now, the first thing i do when handling a return is check the date on the receipt. if the items were purchased more than 30 days before, i can only issue store credit.
so, looking at the receipt i noticed it was dated 7/05/06.
that's right. he purchased the mugs earlier in the day.
well, not exactly 'purchased'. upon closer inspection, i saw he had brought back a more expensive mug and exchanged it for the two mugs he was trying to return in my bux.
"ok," i tell newbie. "you push 'return', enter the sku for the two mugs and then total it out. now you hit the button for store credit - "
"no!" the man interrupted me. "i paid cash for them! i want cash back, not store credit! store credit is useless to me!"
"oh, i'm sorry sir, but i can only give you store credit - "
"no!" he interrupts me again. "i paid cash!"
"i'm sorry, but the receipt doesn't reflect that you paid cash. it only shows that you returned a mug and exchanged them for these two."
"well, what happened was my wife wanted a mug, so i bought one of those big ones, and then she said she wanted one with a handle, so i got her these two but i guess these are the wrong kind and she wants me to return them."
"i understand, and i would give you cash back if i could," i totally lied, but since i knew he was lying to me i didn't feel the slightest bit guilty. "but the computer system won't allow me to do that since the receipt doesn't show a cash transaction."
"well, they took my original receipt that showed i paid cash!"
"oh, well you should go back to that store. they probably still have the receipt and you can get cash back from them." i told him, knowing full well no such receipt existed.
scammer man left unhappy, and without cash in his pocket.
i then explained to newbie that a common scam is to steal a mug, take it to a bux and and exchange it for something different - then go to ANOTHER bux and try to either fool or intimidate the register partner into giving back cash.
the very sad thing is it works more often than it should, which is why the scam will continue.
customer rant: your condiment bar is right across from the registers. that means every time you ring someone up, you are facing the condiment bar. i know you're not visually impaired, so i can only assume you are failing to do your duty. why the hell is your condiment bar such a mess?!? how can you stand directly across from it and not be bothered by the trash overflowing, the granules of sugar spilled across the top, and the containers with dried milk on the side? please, do your job or quit.
7.04.2006
deserved day off!
i'm so lucky i managed 4th of july off!
what a great way to reset after a holiday weekend that felt tortuous.
we started friday off with only 1 working blender. now, my bux is a high volume frappuccino bux, so with the addtion of the new juice blended drinks, as well as the hundred of other blended drinks we offer, it was hell doing it all on one blender since the other blender died on us. i can't even describe the anxiety that builds when you see a line of twenty frappuccinos - all totally different - and realizing you have to make then one at a time because some manager dropped the ball and forgot to back stock blenders for weekends just like this.
by saturday we realized the manager (who decided to take the entire weekend off because of the leadership conference, which only actually lasted thursday and friday) had neglected to schedule us properly. this meant many, many phone calls to get borrowed partners to fill the missing shifts. unfortunately, the people willing to take the shifts were far from stellar and our store looked like a hurricane hit by the end of the night.
sunday seemed to start of smoothly, but it soon became evident that we were going to run out of key product before noon, so the morning was spent calling other stores and then driving to them for product.
i wish i could say that was the worst of the worst for sunday - but no.
looking at the schedule for the closing shifts, it became evident that we would need to find a closing lead. why? because the closing lead (borrowed from another bux) that was scheduled had been fired three days earlier.
that's right. my manager scheduled someone she knew wouldn't be able to work the shift since his manager informed my manager that he was on his way out.
i guess karma isn't to be messed with because guess who had to drag their ass into bux and close the store?
that's right - my manager.
and i didn't feel the slightest bit bad for her, either.
so, today i am watching world cup and tour de france - then it's fireworks time.
i am going to enjoy a frappuccino-free day, that's for sure.
barista rant: don't give me attitude because i didn't say hi to you at our local market the other day! guess what? i'm PAID to be nice and welcoming at bux. on my days off i don't wear a green apron. if you saw me at ralphs, and if i failed to notice you standing in the cereal aisle, well - get over it! don't get pissed because i didn't recognize you and ask how your day was. if you tipped more often, it would probably be easier to remember you.
what a great way to reset after a holiday weekend that felt tortuous.
we started friday off with only 1 working blender. now, my bux is a high volume frappuccino bux, so with the addtion of the new juice blended drinks, as well as the hundred of other blended drinks we offer, it was hell doing it all on one blender since the other blender died on us. i can't even describe the anxiety that builds when you see a line of twenty frappuccinos - all totally different - and realizing you have to make then one at a time because some manager dropped the ball and forgot to back stock blenders for weekends just like this.
by saturday we realized the manager (who decided to take the entire weekend off because of the leadership conference, which only actually lasted thursday and friday) had neglected to schedule us properly. this meant many, many phone calls to get borrowed partners to fill the missing shifts. unfortunately, the people willing to take the shifts were far from stellar and our store looked like a hurricane hit by the end of the night.
sunday seemed to start of smoothly, but it soon became evident that we were going to run out of key product before noon, so the morning was spent calling other stores and then driving to them for product.
i wish i could say that was the worst of the worst for sunday - but no.
looking at the schedule for the closing shifts, it became evident that we would need to find a closing lead. why? because the closing lead (borrowed from another bux) that was scheduled had been fired three days earlier.
that's right. my manager scheduled someone she knew wouldn't be able to work the shift since his manager informed my manager that he was on his way out.
i guess karma isn't to be messed with because guess who had to drag their ass into bux and close the store?
that's right - my manager.
and i didn't feel the slightest bit bad for her, either.
so, today i am watching world cup and tour de france - then it's fireworks time.
i am going to enjoy a frappuccino-free day, that's for sure.
barista rant: don't give me attitude because i didn't say hi to you at our local market the other day! guess what? i'm PAID to be nice and welcoming at bux. on my days off i don't wear a green apron. if you saw me at ralphs, and if i failed to notice you standing in the cereal aisle, well - get over it! don't get pissed because i didn't recognize you and ask how your day was. if you tipped more often, it would probably be easier to remember you.
6.29.2006
ho-hum
i'm sorry i've been lax with the posts as of late. i wish i could say that my bux has been perfect, leaving nothing to rant about, but unfortunately that isn't true.
in fact, there is much to bitch and complain about, but i have been too overwhelmed with looking for coverage/training/calling people in early/calling other stores for product/dealing with mismanaged schedules/dealing with unhappy customers to post.
for that i apologize. i can tell i need a mini-holiday of sorts because my frustration level is reaching its maximum. i'm getting to the point of not wanting to go to work, even if i'm scheduled with a bomb ass crew. i can feel patience has run out and i fear going off on the next customer that tells me their drink "just doesn't taste right".
i'm hoping these next few days will be better because all the managers (including mine) will be at the leadership conference. not really a 'cat's away, mice will play' situation, but slightly more relaxed nonetheless. here's to hoping we don't run out of espresso like we did last weekend.
guest ranter, shannon: Although my rant is rather trivial in comparison to my fellow customer's sandwich grievance, I am curious as to why 'Bux lingo isn't taught throughout the organization. While on a jaunt through California this past week I decide I needed a caffeinated fix so I went to a local small town 'Bux. I ordered my usual and requested that it be melted. This stumped the Barstonian Barista so much that I - the customer - had to tell the employee what I was referring to. This isn't the first time this has happened, so... what gives?
it's true, because of the constant turnover, the lingo (which SHOULD be key) is lost everytime a partner leaves. i feel your frustration, i really do. 80% of the time i ask for an 'old school' americano, i'm met with a dumb look and a "huh?". that's why i always try to educate my fellow partners, but as you already well know - i'm one in a million! it really sucks when the customer has to educate the employee, but it happens.
in fact, there is much to bitch and complain about, but i have been too overwhelmed with looking for coverage/training/calling people in early/calling other stores for product/dealing with mismanaged schedules/dealing with unhappy customers to post.
for that i apologize. i can tell i need a mini-holiday of sorts because my frustration level is reaching its maximum. i'm getting to the point of not wanting to go to work, even if i'm scheduled with a bomb ass crew. i can feel patience has run out and i fear going off on the next customer that tells me their drink "just doesn't taste right".
i'm hoping these next few days will be better because all the managers (including mine) will be at the leadership conference. not really a 'cat's away, mice will play' situation, but slightly more relaxed nonetheless. here's to hoping we don't run out of espresso like we did last weekend.
guest ranter, shannon: Although my rant is rather trivial in comparison to my fellow customer's sandwich grievance, I am curious as to why 'Bux lingo isn't taught throughout the organization. While on a jaunt through California this past week I decide I needed a caffeinated fix so I went to a local small town 'Bux. I ordered my usual and requested that it be melted. This stumped the Barstonian Barista so much that I - the customer - had to tell the employee what I was referring to. This isn't the first time this has happened, so... what gives?
it's true, because of the constant turnover, the lingo (which SHOULD be key) is lost everytime a partner leaves. i feel your frustration, i really do. 80% of the time i ask for an 'old school' americano, i'm met with a dumb look and a "huh?". that's why i always try to educate my fellow partners, but as you already well know - i'm one in a million! it really sucks when the customer has to educate the employee, but it happens.
6.27.2006
customers want their 15 minutes
what happened to those customers that would come in, order their drink, pay and then leave?
why does everything - including getting a bux drink - have to be some huge ordeal now?
this morning i had to serve perpetual diet lady. not only do i need to look up the calorie count, but i have to listen to her dumb life story about how she's always gained weight easily, how she really, really loves frappuccinos but desperately needs something with less fat and sugar, and how she is willing to forgo food for her damn frappuccino. but wait! that's not the end of it! she will then regale the barista with tales about all her failed diets, about the time she tried ephedra and how people sometimes mistake her for being pregnant, all the while sucking up her venti extra caramel extra whipped cream mocha frappuccino LIGHT.
and of course there's the older man who spends fifteen minutes reminiscing about the good ole' days when a cup of coffee was just a cup of coffee.
"why the hell does starBUCKS need to rename the sizes?!? all i want is a cup of coffee! i don't want no language lessons. it used to take me two seconds to order my coffee, now it's longer than the building of that wall in china!"
of course, the he's holding up the bux line with his soapbox tirade, but he doesn't care. and when he has his coffee in hand and goes to the condiment bar, it sets him off on a whole different bitchfest about splenda and artificial sweeteners and how in his day all they had and needed was sugar. really,
it gets old after you've heard it week after week.
and what's with the kids that aren't even in high school yet, but already have a signature bux drink. if it isn't made to their ridiculous speculations, they will pitch a fit and demand it be remade, reminding us that their parents own bux stock. yeah, it's tiring and all too familiar.
partner rant: so today was the official rollout of the new blended drinks. thanks so much marketing team! new blended drinks mean more opportunities for customers to bitch, complain and expect free samples 24/7. it's a million more chances for drinks to be ordered wrong, made correctly, and remade to accommodate a customers mangled idea of what an iced cappuccino is. i'm sure i sound bitter. it's probably because i haven't had a chance to recover from the last rollout.
why does everything - including getting a bux drink - have to be some huge ordeal now?
this morning i had to serve perpetual diet lady. not only do i need to look up the calorie count, but i have to listen to her dumb life story about how she's always gained weight easily, how she really, really loves frappuccinos but desperately needs something with less fat and sugar, and how she is willing to forgo food for her damn frappuccino. but wait! that's not the end of it! she will then regale the barista with tales about all her failed diets, about the time she tried ephedra and how people sometimes mistake her for being pregnant, all the while sucking up her venti extra caramel extra whipped cream mocha frappuccino LIGHT.
and of course there's the older man who spends fifteen minutes reminiscing about the good ole' days when a cup of coffee was just a cup of coffee.
"why the hell does starBUCKS need to rename the sizes?!? all i want is a cup of coffee! i don't want no language lessons. it used to take me two seconds to order my coffee, now it's longer than the building of that wall in china!"
of course, the he's holding up the bux line with his soapbox tirade, but he doesn't care. and when he has his coffee in hand and goes to the condiment bar, it sets him off on a whole different bitchfest about splenda and artificial sweeteners and how in his day all they had and needed was sugar. really,
it gets old after you've heard it week after week.
and what's with the kids that aren't even in high school yet, but already have a signature bux drink. if it isn't made to their ridiculous speculations, they will pitch a fit and demand it be remade, reminding us that their parents own bux stock. yeah, it's tiring and all too familiar.
partner rant: so today was the official rollout of the new blended drinks. thanks so much marketing team! new blended drinks mean more opportunities for customers to bitch, complain and expect free samples 24/7. it's a million more chances for drinks to be ordered wrong, made correctly, and remade to accommodate a customers mangled idea of what an iced cappuccino is. i'm sure i sound bitter. it's probably because i haven't had a chance to recover from the last rollout.
6.25.2006
guest rant
tom wrote:
This is just the thing you started a blog for--an ONLINE CUSTOMER RANT!
Yesterday I was in a Starbucks that I know wasn't yours because I don't think you work in the dim feral branch in the American Airlines terminal at Los Angeles airport. And maybe they make a special kind of dim feral sandwich just for that branch. At any rate, the sandwich in question was a pesto chicken salad sandwich and I am scratching my head wondering how it is possible to make a lump of food so completely absent of flavor or texture. I kept taking bites of the puffy grey-green filling and the puffy grey-beige "bread", straining my tastebuds to pick up anything, anything at all, but all I got was the vaguest hint of freezer burn. And the best part was, it cost me $8.99! As a representative of the Company that sold me this item, I just have to ask you: What up?
two things -
1) bux in airports are not REAL bux. they are what we call 'licensee stores', stores that pay a fee to use the name and coffee, and that's about it. there is a bux representative that periodically goes from licensee store to licensee store, trying to ensure the quality and culture of bux remain intact, but of course that's mostly just for show. the airports are willing to pay the money because they know customers will line up for a cup of bux coffee. (same goes for the 'bux' in albertsons, vons, barnes & noble, etc.). i've only been to one airport bux that was even somewhat decent - and that was in heathrow.
2) the sandwich from airport bux most likely has been sitting in their freezer, then thawed, which accounts for the extreme bland taste. i've actually seen their croissants sitting on the counter defrosting! i'm not surprised at the cost because the airport bux is seriously overpriced. but hey, if you're ever stuck there again, stick with the a.m. pastries instead of a sandwich. you're tastebuds will thank you.
barista rant: please. are SEVEN sweet & lows really needed in your latte? is it truly impossible to settle for FIVE? and was it totally necessary for you to ask me to show you the seven empty wrappers as proof that all that artificial sweetener actually made it into your drink? honestly, i think the real sugar would be a relief to your system.
This is just the thing you started a blog for--an ONLINE CUSTOMER RANT!
Yesterday I was in a Starbucks that I know wasn't yours because I don't think you work in the dim feral branch in the American Airlines terminal at Los Angeles airport. And maybe they make a special kind of dim feral sandwich just for that branch. At any rate, the sandwich in question was a pesto chicken salad sandwich and I am scratching my head wondering how it is possible to make a lump of food so completely absent of flavor or texture. I kept taking bites of the puffy grey-green filling and the puffy grey-beige "bread", straining my tastebuds to pick up anything, anything at all, but all I got was the vaguest hint of freezer burn. And the best part was, it cost me $8.99! As a representative of the Company that sold me this item, I just have to ask you: What up?
two things -
1) bux in airports are not REAL bux. they are what we call 'licensee stores', stores that pay a fee to use the name and coffee, and that's about it. there is a bux representative that periodically goes from licensee store to licensee store, trying to ensure the quality and culture of bux remain intact, but of course that's mostly just for show. the airports are willing to pay the money because they know customers will line up for a cup of bux coffee. (same goes for the 'bux' in albertsons, vons, barnes & noble, etc.). i've only been to one airport bux that was even somewhat decent - and that was in heathrow.
2) the sandwich from airport bux most likely has been sitting in their freezer, then thawed, which accounts for the extreme bland taste. i've actually seen their croissants sitting on the counter defrosting! i'm not surprised at the cost because the airport bux is seriously overpriced. but hey, if you're ever stuck there again, stick with the a.m. pastries instead of a sandwich. you're tastebuds will thank you.
barista rant: please. are SEVEN sweet & lows really needed in your latte? is it truly impossible to settle for FIVE? and was it totally necessary for you to ask me to show you the seven empty wrappers as proof that all that artificial sweetener actually made it into your drink? honestly, i think the real sugar would be a relief to your system.
6.22.2006
6.20.2006
why?
there are things management does/does not do that baffles me.
for instance:
- not promoting someone to shift supervisor because they have aspirations of touring with their band. as i see it, unless this person has told you they don't want the promotion and have definite tour dates, promote him! don't hold him back because he has a friggen' dream!
- scheduling people outside of their availability. um, hello? you know those pieces of paper where each partner writes out their available times to work? well, use them! they're not just for decoration, you know!
- passing the (star)buck. don't blame your leads for not ordering correctly. don't blame your non-deserving assistant manager for not grinding coffee. don't blame the closing crew for the trash not being tossed out. if you are the manager, everything that goes wrong or right has your name on it. that's the way it works.
- preferring partners liking you to respecting you. guess what, no matter how hard you try if we don't respect you, we will never like you. so don't try and talk to us like you're our cool cousin. just do your job and all will be good.
in my opinion, if you take on the title, you take on the responsibility. if you can't hack it, transfer to a slower store. don't punish us for your inabilities. that sucks and that's the primary reason everyone is now jumping ship.
barista rant: when i ask you if you want a drink hot or iced, don't huff and roll your eyes like i'm stupid. especially if you just ordered a "no coffee mocha cappuccino" and what you really wanted was a chocolate cream frappuccino. it really doesn't bother me that you screwed up the lingo. it's the attitude i hate. so if you don't want me to verify your order: learn starbonics!
for instance:
- not promoting someone to shift supervisor because they have aspirations of touring with their band. as i see it, unless this person has told you they don't want the promotion and have definite tour dates, promote him! don't hold him back because he has a friggen' dream!
- scheduling people outside of their availability. um, hello? you know those pieces of paper where each partner writes out their available times to work? well, use them! they're not just for decoration, you know!
- passing the (star)buck. don't blame your leads for not ordering correctly. don't blame your non-deserving assistant manager for not grinding coffee. don't blame the closing crew for the trash not being tossed out. if you are the manager, everything that goes wrong or right has your name on it. that's the way it works.
- preferring partners liking you to respecting you. guess what, no matter how hard you try if we don't respect you, we will never like you. so don't try and talk to us like you're our cool cousin. just do your job and all will be good.
in my opinion, if you take on the title, you take on the responsibility. if you can't hack it, transfer to a slower store. don't punish us for your inabilities. that sucks and that's the primary reason everyone is now jumping ship.
barista rant: when i ask you if you want a drink hot or iced, don't huff and roll your eyes like i'm stupid. especially if you just ordered a "no coffee mocha cappuccino" and what you really wanted was a chocolate cream frappuccino. it really doesn't bother me that you screwed up the lingo. it's the attitude i hate. so if you don't want me to verify your order: learn starbonics!
6.19.2006
how much would you pay?
the interesting thing about customers is there's no real middle ground.
they are all over the spectrum when it comes to behaviour, expectations and attitude.
for instance, today a woman ordered a frappuccino for her husband and then three additional frappuccinos. the register partner rang her up for the four drinks and i made all four in a timely manner. when i presented the drinks to the customer, she informed me that she only ordered two drinks: one for her husband and one for herself.
this is the part i don't understand - this woman thought she had ordered only two drinks and happily forked over fifteen dollars for them. FIFTEEN DOLLARS! i know people bitch about bux prices, but inflation and profit margins have not driven the cost of two frappuccinos to fifteen dollars.
not yet, at least.
we refunded the lady her money and she just laughed it off.
then, not ten minutes later, another customer came in and painstakingly ordered two drinks. she ordered, and reordered about three different times. i charged her for the two drinks, but not before i AGAIN repeated her order to her and confirmed that she was ordering only two drinks.
so, guess what happened?
yup, not only did she take her two drinks, she took a drink that belonged to another customer.
maybe it's me. maybe holding two fingers up and asking "only two drinks, right?" means something totally different outside of bux. i suppose i could have been the victim of cultural differences, but i highly doubt it. she must have thought she was getting a super deal when paying just seven dollars for three drinks.
partner rant: so yeah. you decided this summer we should have even more blended drinks. well, couldn't you have at least ensured they tasted good? today my fellow baristas and i sampled these new drinks. yuck is all i have to say. what they lack in flavor, they make up in annoyance. please, try and refrain from putting disgusting drinks on the menu that will only make our jobs even harder when customers decide they want us to make them something entirely different. something that doesn't taste like crap.
they are all over the spectrum when it comes to behaviour, expectations and attitude.
for instance, today a woman ordered a frappuccino for her husband and then three additional frappuccinos. the register partner rang her up for the four drinks and i made all four in a timely manner. when i presented the drinks to the customer, she informed me that she only ordered two drinks: one for her husband and one for herself.
this is the part i don't understand - this woman thought she had ordered only two drinks and happily forked over fifteen dollars for them. FIFTEEN DOLLARS! i know people bitch about bux prices, but inflation and profit margins have not driven the cost of two frappuccinos to fifteen dollars.
not yet, at least.
we refunded the lady her money and she just laughed it off.
then, not ten minutes later, another customer came in and painstakingly ordered two drinks. she ordered, and reordered about three different times. i charged her for the two drinks, but not before i AGAIN repeated her order to her and confirmed that she was ordering only two drinks.
so, guess what happened?
yup, not only did she take her two drinks, she took a drink that belonged to another customer.
maybe it's me. maybe holding two fingers up and asking "only two drinks, right?" means something totally different outside of bux. i suppose i could have been the victim of cultural differences, but i highly doubt it. she must have thought she was getting a super deal when paying just seven dollars for three drinks.
partner rant: so yeah. you decided this summer we should have even more blended drinks. well, couldn't you have at least ensured they tasted good? today my fellow baristas and i sampled these new drinks. yuck is all i have to say. what they lack in flavor, they make up in annoyance. please, try and refrain from putting disgusting drinks on the menu that will only make our jobs even harder when customers decide they want us to make them something entirely different. something that doesn't taste like crap.
6.18.2006
bizarre bux
odd conversations i had today:
barista buddy: "hey brat, will you come to the bathroom with me?"
barista brat: "uh, what?!?"
buddy: "come to the bathroom with me, i need you to take a picture of me in my bux apron."
brat: "why do we need to do it in the bathroom?"
buddy: "because all i'm going to be wearing is my apron."
brat: "what the hell!"
buddy: "yeah, it's for my myspace page."
customer: "hey, can i get a discount if i know how to make my drink?"
barista brat: "excuse me?"
customer: "yeah, if i know the drink recipe, do i get a discount?"
brat: "um, no."
customer: "well, that's not really fair!"
brat: "are you kidding me?"
customer: "if i say yes will you give me a discount?"
brat: "no."
customer: "well, it was worth a try."
customer comes in loudly strumming a guitar (and poorly, i might add).
barista brat: "i'm sorry, but you can't play your guitar in here."
customer: "why not?"
brat: "because it's loud and annoying and i won't allow it."
customer: "fine, if you're happy with being a cog in the corporate america wheel."
brat: "sure, use whatever reason you want - just stop your noise pollution."
barista rant: how hard is it to throw your damn straw wrapper in the trash? the trash can is located right in front of you when you collect your drink! why do you feel the need to leave the wrapper on the serving counter when it takes .003 seconds to toss it in the trash? you know, the trash can that is DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF YOU when you peel the wrapper of your damn straw. am i really asking too much of you? honestly, i don't think so. why don't you think of it as a game, ok? i'll even give you high five if you succeed.
barista buddy: "hey brat, will you come to the bathroom with me?"
barista brat: "uh, what?!?"
buddy: "come to the bathroom with me, i need you to take a picture of me in my bux apron."
brat: "why do we need to do it in the bathroom?"
buddy: "because all i'm going to be wearing is my apron."
brat: "what the hell!"
buddy: "yeah, it's for my myspace page."
customer: "hey, can i get a discount if i know how to make my drink?"
barista brat: "excuse me?"
customer: "yeah, if i know the drink recipe, do i get a discount?"
brat: "um, no."
customer: "well, that's not really fair!"
brat: "are you kidding me?"
customer: "if i say yes will you give me a discount?"
brat: "no."
customer: "well, it was worth a try."
customer comes in loudly strumming a guitar (and poorly, i might add).
barista brat: "i'm sorry, but you can't play your guitar in here."
customer: "why not?"
brat: "because it's loud and annoying and i won't allow it."
customer: "fine, if you're happy with being a cog in the corporate america wheel."
brat: "sure, use whatever reason you want - just stop your noise pollution."
barista rant: how hard is it to throw your damn straw wrapper in the trash? the trash can is located right in front of you when you collect your drink! why do you feel the need to leave the wrapper on the serving counter when it takes .003 seconds to toss it in the trash? you know, the trash can that is DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF YOU when you peel the wrapper of your damn straw. am i really asking too much of you? honestly, i don't think so. why don't you think of it as a game, ok? i'll even give you high five if you succeed.
6.16.2006
stupid 'just say yes' policy
grrrrr!
today's post is one giant barista rant:
believe it or not, my shift started off really well. i was working with my awesome assistant manager and although we had crazy frappuccino rushes (and we were working with the other assistant manager who is pretty useless), it wasn't a bad day. that is until my awesome assistant manager took her lunch break and ms. bitch lady of the day came in.
while i was making a frappuccino bitch lady taps on the glass that separates the baristas from the customers and asks me to throw some espresso beans into the drink.
"i'm sorry, but that's against policy and i can't do it." i informed her.
"just a couple," she smiled sweetly.
"the reason i can't is because it's a health code violation. the beans have certain oils on them that some people are allergic to, so i'm not allowed to blend them in the drink."
"ugh!" she complains. "i've worked in coffee for YEARS. it will be fine, BELIEVE ME. plus, they always do it for me."
now, if i were already having a crappy day i would have told her "tough shit!", but the day had been good and i figured if i just complied begrudgingly this lady would get out of my face.
"i'll do it for you this time, but i'm going to have to sanitize the pitcher so i don't make my other customers sick."
"that's fine," she said flippantly without even a 'thank you'.
so as i'm making the drink with the stupid beans blended in, i called out to my extremely lackluster assistant manager "please empty the sanitizer so i can throw this pitcher in when i'm done making this drink."
"why do we need to sanitize it?" he asked.
"because that customer wanted a special drink with espresso beans." i informed him - and without attitude!
so, when i call out the drink the bitch customer says "oh, this isn't what i ordered!"
that's right. when she asked me to put the beans in the frappuccino i was making it WASN'T EVEN HER DRINK!!!
that meant i would have to REMAKE the damn thing and sanitize ANOTHER pitcher, all the while more and more frappuccinos are piling up.
"you have three venti caramel frappuccinos coming up!" lackluster assistant manager calls out to me.
"it's gonna be a few minutes because i'm down two blending pitchers." i informed him - still with no attitude.
i finished bitch lady's drink and put it on the serving counter, then went back to making drinks. i heard her complaining to my lackluster assistant manager, but all i really caught was "even if it is policy!" and "no need to be rude!"
i just laughed it off because i knew i had been nicer than usual in this circumstance. unfortunately lackluster assistant manager didn't bother to let me know that she was demanding a refund, because if i had known i would've taken her drink off the serving counter and tossed it down the sink.
that's right. the bitch lied about me having attitude, got a refund and took her drink on her way out.
i'm pissed off for two reasons. the obvious one is because i went OUT of my way to fix her damn drink, while making sure i thoroughly cleaned out the pitchers as to not make other customers sick. the other reason i'm pissed is because my lackluster assistant manager didn't have the brains to let me know that she was demanding a refund.
what a tool! didn't he realize she was going to take the drink unless he told me to take it off the damn counter?
well, i've learned my lesson. i'm just going to be a barista nazi when it comes to customized drinks. you can all blame bitch lady.
today's post is one giant barista rant:
believe it or not, my shift started off really well. i was working with my awesome assistant manager and although we had crazy frappuccino rushes (and we were working with the other assistant manager who is pretty useless), it wasn't a bad day. that is until my awesome assistant manager took her lunch break and ms. bitch lady of the day came in.
while i was making a frappuccino bitch lady taps on the glass that separates the baristas from the customers and asks me to throw some espresso beans into the drink.
"i'm sorry, but that's against policy and i can't do it." i informed her.
"just a couple," she smiled sweetly.
"the reason i can't is because it's a health code violation. the beans have certain oils on them that some people are allergic to, so i'm not allowed to blend them in the drink."
"ugh!" she complains. "i've worked in coffee for YEARS. it will be fine, BELIEVE ME. plus, they always do it for me."
now, if i were already having a crappy day i would have told her "tough shit!", but the day had been good and i figured if i just complied begrudgingly this lady would get out of my face.
"i'll do it for you this time, but i'm going to have to sanitize the pitcher so i don't make my other customers sick."
"that's fine," she said flippantly without even a 'thank you'.
so as i'm making the drink with the stupid beans blended in, i called out to my extremely lackluster assistant manager "please empty the sanitizer so i can throw this pitcher in when i'm done making this drink."
"why do we need to sanitize it?" he asked.
"because that customer wanted a special drink with espresso beans." i informed him - and without attitude!
so, when i call out the drink the bitch customer says "oh, this isn't what i ordered!"
that's right. when she asked me to put the beans in the frappuccino i was making it WASN'T EVEN HER DRINK!!!
that meant i would have to REMAKE the damn thing and sanitize ANOTHER pitcher, all the while more and more frappuccinos are piling up.
"you have three venti caramel frappuccinos coming up!" lackluster assistant manager calls out to me.
"it's gonna be a few minutes because i'm down two blending pitchers." i informed him - still with no attitude.
i finished bitch lady's drink and put it on the serving counter, then went back to making drinks. i heard her complaining to my lackluster assistant manager, but all i really caught was "even if it is policy!" and "no need to be rude!"
i just laughed it off because i knew i had been nicer than usual in this circumstance. unfortunately lackluster assistant manager didn't bother to let me know that she was demanding a refund, because if i had known i would've taken her drink off the serving counter and tossed it down the sink.
that's right. the bitch lied about me having attitude, got a refund and took her drink on her way out.
i'm pissed off for two reasons. the obvious one is because i went OUT of my way to fix her damn drink, while making sure i thoroughly cleaned out the pitchers as to not make other customers sick. the other reason i'm pissed is because my lackluster assistant manager didn't have the brains to let me know that she was demanding a refund.
what a tool! didn't he realize she was going to take the drink unless he told me to take it off the damn counter?
well, i've learned my lesson. i'm just going to be a barista nazi when it comes to customized drinks. you can all blame bitch lady.
6.15.2006
go back to where you came from!
you already well know what i think of partners from other stores that come into my bux and order frappuccinos and super high maintenance drinks.
i hate them.
i especially hate that they almost always have attitude and they never tip - which they really should because their drinks are five times more complicated and time consuming than a normal drink off the menu.
i always tip when i go to a bux other than my own (i never go to my bux to get drinks. that's just too much time at work, even for me). i'm always polite, i always clearly state my order with a "may i have...", and i always thank the barista when my drinks are made.
and i'm not looking for a pat on the back for all this. it's just common decency. i think it takes more effort to be a jerk than to be pleasant and that's why i take offence to customers that come in with attitude, and why i despise partners that are growly.
the other day a partner from another store came in and asked for a caramel frappuccino. but wait - there's more: she wanted whipped cream and caramel at the bottom of her cup, whipped cream and caramel sauce, not syrup, blended in the drink as well as some malt powder and a shot of espresso. after the frappuccino was poured inside the cup she wanted another shot on top, then a layer of caramel, then more whipped cream, another layer of caramel and coconut flakes on top.
as if her drink wasn't bad enough, her attitude was even worse.
"you charged me too much!" she bitched when the register partner rang her up.
"no, i applied your discount," my fellow barista replied.
"hey, i get this drink from my store all the time. don't charge me for two add shots, just charge me for the one. and ring it up as a tall frappuccino because the added espresso makes the frappuccino bigger. and you should just throw the malt in for me because i'm a partner." she rattled off.
"um, no. since you're a partner you KNOW i have to charge you correctly." my fellow barista flat out told her.
"if you hook me up now, i'll hook you up when you come to my store." she tried to bargain.
"not a chance." was my fellow baristas final word.
it's sad but true, sometimes partners are worse customers than our customers.
barista rant: i've ranted about this before and i'm going to rant about it again. WASH OUT YOUR DAMN PERSONAL MUG! if you bring in your own commuter mug don't expect me to clean it for you because i won't. the most you'll get from me is a quick rinse, and that's for my benefit, not yours. it's because the rancid smell emanating from the bottom of your cup makes me want to gag, and a quick rinse helps me keep it together long enough to get you out of my store. and don't come back to me when your drink is made and complain about a "chunk" floating at the top of your mug. you brought that chunk in with you, and you can take it right back out.
i hate them.
i especially hate that they almost always have attitude and they never tip - which they really should because their drinks are five times more complicated and time consuming than a normal drink off the menu.
i always tip when i go to a bux other than my own (i never go to my bux to get drinks. that's just too much time at work, even for me). i'm always polite, i always clearly state my order with a "may i have...", and i always thank the barista when my drinks are made.
and i'm not looking for a pat on the back for all this. it's just common decency. i think it takes more effort to be a jerk than to be pleasant and that's why i take offence to customers that come in with attitude, and why i despise partners that are growly.
the other day a partner from another store came in and asked for a caramel frappuccino. but wait - there's more: she wanted whipped cream and caramel at the bottom of her cup, whipped cream and caramel sauce, not syrup, blended in the drink as well as some malt powder and a shot of espresso. after the frappuccino was poured inside the cup she wanted another shot on top, then a layer of caramel, then more whipped cream, another layer of caramel and coconut flakes on top.
as if her drink wasn't bad enough, her attitude was even worse.
"you charged me too much!" she bitched when the register partner rang her up.
"no, i applied your discount," my fellow barista replied.
"hey, i get this drink from my store all the time. don't charge me for two add shots, just charge me for the one. and ring it up as a tall frappuccino because the added espresso makes the frappuccino bigger. and you should just throw the malt in for me because i'm a partner." she rattled off.
"um, no. since you're a partner you KNOW i have to charge you correctly." my fellow barista flat out told her.
"if you hook me up now, i'll hook you up when you come to my store." she tried to bargain.
"not a chance." was my fellow baristas final word.
it's sad but true, sometimes partners are worse customers than our customers.
barista rant: i've ranted about this before and i'm going to rant about it again. WASH OUT YOUR DAMN PERSONAL MUG! if you bring in your own commuter mug don't expect me to clean it for you because i won't. the most you'll get from me is a quick rinse, and that's for my benefit, not yours. it's because the rancid smell emanating from the bottom of your cup makes me want to gag, and a quick rinse helps me keep it together long enough to get you out of my store. and don't come back to me when your drink is made and complain about a "chunk" floating at the top of your mug. you brought that chunk in with you, and you can take it right back out.
6.13.2006
friend or foe
i've already well documented how customers can piss us baristas off, but what i find really funny is when customers piss each other off.
incident #1
only two customers in line. customer 'a' was ordering her drinks while customer 'b' was perusing the pastry case. customer 'a' ends up ordering a pastry that customer 'b' had just decided she couldn't live without. when customer 'b' asked if we had any more of her chosen pastry in the backroom, she was heartbroken to find out that customer 'a' had taken the last one. usually a customer would get pissed off at the barista at a time like this, but instead customer 'b' gave customer 'a' a dirty look and hissed, "you knew i wanted that and you ordered it anyway!" to which customer 'a' just shrugged. "i hope you get food poisoning from that!" customer 'b' hissed again.
i tell ya, it was almost surreal. i'm sure us baristas will be talking about this for days.
incident #2
we got a rush out of nowhere. six people in line and only two of us on the floor. normally this isn't such a big deal, but the woman at the front of the line didn't know what she wanted to drink. instead of letting the people behind her order, she asked the register partner about every single drink and what they tasted like. a man in the back of the line started screaming at her to just order something - fast. i swear, it was just like that scene in that will ferrell movie. the lady called him rude and continued to muse over the menu. the guy kept telling her to hurry it up and calling her a "slow cow". needless to say, i let the register partner deal with the slow cow while i took the orders from the other people in line. they were all happy with me, but hated that lady.
but here's the best part: the lady didn't end up ordering anything! instead she asked us for a glass of water.
partner rant: bux, you're gonna be the death of me. don't you think we already have enough blended drinks? don't you remember what a failure the tiazzis were? so why are you bringing back fruit slushie type drinks? where do you think we will store the damn things? please, let's get back to simplicity.
incident #1
only two customers in line. customer 'a' was ordering her drinks while customer 'b' was perusing the pastry case. customer 'a' ends up ordering a pastry that customer 'b' had just decided she couldn't live without. when customer 'b' asked if we had any more of her chosen pastry in the backroom, she was heartbroken to find out that customer 'a' had taken the last one. usually a customer would get pissed off at the barista at a time like this, but instead customer 'b' gave customer 'a' a dirty look and hissed, "you knew i wanted that and you ordered it anyway!" to which customer 'a' just shrugged. "i hope you get food poisoning from that!" customer 'b' hissed again.
i tell ya, it was almost surreal. i'm sure us baristas will be talking about this for days.
incident #2
we got a rush out of nowhere. six people in line and only two of us on the floor. normally this isn't such a big deal, but the woman at the front of the line didn't know what she wanted to drink. instead of letting the people behind her order, she asked the register partner about every single drink and what they tasted like. a man in the back of the line started screaming at her to just order something - fast. i swear, it was just like that scene in that will ferrell movie. the lady called him rude and continued to muse over the menu. the guy kept telling her to hurry it up and calling her a "slow cow". needless to say, i let the register partner deal with the slow cow while i took the orders from the other people in line. they were all happy with me, but hated that lady.
but here's the best part: the lady didn't end up ordering anything! instead she asked us for a glass of water.
partner rant: bux, you're gonna be the death of me. don't you think we already have enough blended drinks? don't you remember what a failure the tiazzis were? so why are you bringing back fruit slushie type drinks? where do you think we will store the damn things? please, let's get back to simplicity.
6.12.2006
50/50 day
things that pissed me off today:
- customer dropped forty dollars while at the register. barista picked it up and returned it to her while she was at the condiment bar. the lady doesn't smile and doesn't thank the barista. instead she huffed because he interrupted her while she put cream into her coffee.
- customer ordered an espresso brownie, then got upset because he waited ten minutes and his drink was never made. when asked what drink he'd ordered, the guy replied "espresso brownie". when we explained an espresso brownie was a pastry and he was holding it in his hand, he got gruff and blamed the register partner for messing up his order.
- the customer who was very specific about the amount of classic syrup she wanted in her iced tea. i made it to her specifications and she told me it was too sweet. i offered to remake it so she would quit her griping. she sighed and said "ok, but i want to see how many pumps of syrup you put in." she asked me to count out loud each time i put a pump of syrup in her tea (like i was a three-year old). then she had the nerve to say, "hmm, it's still too sweet. maybe i should get it with only two pumps, not three. can you make it again?"
things that made me smile today:
- loyal customer saw we were short handed today and brought in lunch for all the baristas.
- an older woman ordered a tea and realized she didn't have enough cash. a teenager behind her in line offered to pay so the woman wouldn't have to use her credit card.
- my awesome assistant manager. i just love this gal to death. any day i work with her is a great day.
- being thanked by a customer for making her drink perfectly.
- a customer throwing five bucks in the tip jar because the baristas made him laugh out loud.
partner rant: your days are numbered, newbie. do you honestly think blaming everything you do wrong on everyone else is going to work for you? every partner has tried to train you and teach you how to do things correctly, but instead of making an effort to do things right, you'd rather suck as a barista and put the blame on everyone else. well, yesterday you crossed the line. how DARE you insinuate that i was the reason your till was short. how DARE you lie and tell the managers the reason the floor was messy was because i told you it was more important to do things fast than correctly. you're too stupid to realize that my reputation precedes me, that i'm a bombass barista, and that my managers would sooner drink bleach than give credence to your sad attempt to slander me.
-
- customer dropped forty dollars while at the register. barista picked it up and returned it to her while she was at the condiment bar. the lady doesn't smile and doesn't thank the barista. instead she huffed because he interrupted her while she put cream into her coffee.
- customer ordered an espresso brownie, then got upset because he waited ten minutes and his drink was never made. when asked what drink he'd ordered, the guy replied "espresso brownie". when we explained an espresso brownie was a pastry and he was holding it in his hand, he got gruff and blamed the register partner for messing up his order.
- the customer who was very specific about the amount of classic syrup she wanted in her iced tea. i made it to her specifications and she told me it was too sweet. i offered to remake it so she would quit her griping. she sighed and said "ok, but i want to see how many pumps of syrup you put in." she asked me to count out loud each time i put a pump of syrup in her tea (like i was a three-year old). then she had the nerve to say, "hmm, it's still too sweet. maybe i should get it with only two pumps, not three. can you make it again?"
things that made me smile today:
- loyal customer saw we were short handed today and brought in lunch for all the baristas.
- an older woman ordered a tea and realized she didn't have enough cash. a teenager behind her in line offered to pay so the woman wouldn't have to use her credit card.
- my awesome assistant manager. i just love this gal to death. any day i work with her is a great day.
- being thanked by a customer for making her drink perfectly.
- a customer throwing five bucks in the tip jar because the baristas made him laugh out loud.
partner rant: your days are numbered, newbie. do you honestly think blaming everything you do wrong on everyone else is going to work for you? every partner has tried to train you and teach you how to do things correctly, but instead of making an effort to do things right, you'd rather suck as a barista and put the blame on everyone else. well, yesterday you crossed the line. how DARE you insinuate that i was the reason your till was short. how DARE you lie and tell the managers the reason the floor was messy was because i told you it was more important to do things fast than correctly. you're too stupid to realize that my reputation precedes me, that i'm a bombass barista, and that my managers would sooner drink bleach than give credence to your sad attempt to slander me.
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6.11.2006
my wtf moment
tonight's post will be one huge partner rant.
i've had one foot out the door of my bux for months now. my former manager knew of my plans to transfer stores, all my fellow baristas have known about my plans to change bux's and my current manager came into my bux knowing i was on my way out.
the reason i've stayed is because i'm an idiot.
well, not quite. maybe i'm just a little sentimental. there have been a lot of issues/concerns/transitions in my bux for two fiscal quarters and i've stuck around to help with the process. i'm not the sort to leave when the going gets tough and i have mad love for several of my partners so i put my plans for a transfer on hold.
as i see it, my bux is now pretty well stabilized.
well, for the time being at least. it's true, by summer's end we will be missing some key players. a couple are leaving the state, one is being promoted and one has is retiring from the business of making coffee. i had decided far in advance that i would not be around in august to help with yet another transition. in fact, i've made it so abundantly clear that every few days i'm asked "when are you leaving?" by customers and partners alike.
so why the hell did my current manager give me a pout and puppy dog eyes when i informed her that the transfer ball has indeed started rolling? why did she say "ooh, i don't think this is such a good time to go. you know we have so many peeps leaving and not enough people trained to fill in the gaps".
um, W...T...F?!?
i'm not asking permission to leave this bux. i'm telling you that my departure is imminent. i've been upfront and honest about everything concerning my transfer and it's certainly not MY fault if you chose to pretend i'd be here forever.
guess what? i AM leaving. you CAN'T stop me. and if you don't start training people fast, you will be FUCKED.
if i were you, i'd spend my time hiring/training, and not huffing/whining.
i've had one foot out the door of my bux for months now. my former manager knew of my plans to transfer stores, all my fellow baristas have known about my plans to change bux's and my current manager came into my bux knowing i was on my way out.
the reason i've stayed is because i'm an idiot.
well, not quite. maybe i'm just a little sentimental. there have been a lot of issues/concerns/transitions in my bux for two fiscal quarters and i've stuck around to help with the process. i'm not the sort to leave when the going gets tough and i have mad love for several of my partners so i put my plans for a transfer on hold.
as i see it, my bux is now pretty well stabilized.
well, for the time being at least. it's true, by summer's end we will be missing some key players. a couple are leaving the state, one is being promoted and one has is retiring from the business of making coffee. i had decided far in advance that i would not be around in august to help with yet another transition. in fact, i've made it so abundantly clear that every few days i'm asked "when are you leaving?" by customers and partners alike.
so why the hell did my current manager give me a pout and puppy dog eyes when i informed her that the transfer ball has indeed started rolling? why did she say "ooh, i don't think this is such a good time to go. you know we have so many peeps leaving and not enough people trained to fill in the gaps".
um, W...T...F?!?
i'm not asking permission to leave this bux. i'm telling you that my departure is imminent. i've been upfront and honest about everything concerning my transfer and it's certainly not MY fault if you chose to pretend i'd be here forever.
guess what? i AM leaving. you CAN'T stop me. and if you don't start training people fast, you will be FUCKED.
if i were you, i'd spend my time hiring/training, and not huffing/whining.
6.09.2006
here comes the grump
sorry about the lack of posts. blogger has been brattier than a barista these past few days.
i know it's annoying to go into a bux and have the barista ask "what do you want" without a smile, much less a "hi, how are you". i'm sure you want to smack them upside their smug little heads, hoping it will knock some politeness into them. what's equally annoying are the customers that are always growly faced, no matter how nice the barista might be.
we have one such customer named colette.
colette is the coldest fish i've ever encountered. it doesn't matter that we always greet her with a "hello colette! how are you today?". it doesn't matter that we know her drink and usually have it made by the time she's finished paying. and of course it doesn't matter that we thank her and bid her a good day.
in the last two years colette has done little else but grunt and toss her money at us.
and you know what? it sucks. really it does.
but we are baristas and part of our job description is to be welcoming to our customers ('guests' in starbonics). even though we are paid to be pleasant and say 'thank you', it still feels pretty rotten when someone can't return a smile day after day, week after week, year after year.
i'm tempted to mess up colette's drink on purpose, just to see if she's capable of any sort of emotion. but really, i don't think she is.
partner rant: why can't you multi-task? one do you make only one drink at a time? why do you stand and watch the blender until it finishes it's cycle, instead of preparing the next drink? and why, oh why do you only single bag the trash cans? i get it, you have a one track mind, but if you want to keep your job you better learn to walk and chew gum at the same time.
i know it's annoying to go into a bux and have the barista ask "what do you want" without a smile, much less a "hi, how are you". i'm sure you want to smack them upside their smug little heads, hoping it will knock some politeness into them. what's equally annoying are the customers that are always growly faced, no matter how nice the barista might be.
we have one such customer named colette.
colette is the coldest fish i've ever encountered. it doesn't matter that we always greet her with a "hello colette! how are you today?". it doesn't matter that we know her drink and usually have it made by the time she's finished paying. and of course it doesn't matter that we thank her and bid her a good day.
in the last two years colette has done little else but grunt and toss her money at us.
and you know what? it sucks. really it does.
but we are baristas and part of our job description is to be welcoming to our customers ('guests' in starbonics). even though we are paid to be pleasant and say 'thank you', it still feels pretty rotten when someone can't return a smile day after day, week after week, year after year.
i'm tempted to mess up colette's drink on purpose, just to see if she's capable of any sort of emotion. but really, i don't think she is.
partner rant: why can't you multi-task? one do you make only one drink at a time? why do you stand and watch the blender until it finishes it's cycle, instead of preparing the next drink? and why, oh why do you only single bag the trash cans? i get it, you have a one track mind, but if you want to keep your job you better learn to walk and chew gum at the same time.
6.06.2006
penny for your evil thoughts
this might seem like a minor issue - but it pisses me and my fellow baristas off to no end.
hmm, what could something so small, yet so rage inducing be? well, i'll tell ya: it involves my non-deserving assistant manager and cash.
mr. non-deserving is a nice guy, truly he is. in fact he's so nice that he likes to help out our customers when they're a little short on cash for their drinks. yup, this guy likes to be the bux superhero: "what? not enough pocket money for your addiction? never fear! non-deserving assistant manager is here!"
you might be wondering what is wrong with a guy who will donate some of his cash to a customer who forgot their wallet, who doesn't have enough quarters or who refuses to break a twenty. honestly, nothing is wrong with that.
what's wrong is using OTHER people's money to do it!
here's a little back info: at bux managers do not earn tips. nor are they supposed to handle, look at or think about our tips. they get big money bonuses and we get around a nickel per transaction.
that's why it's so upsetting when our non-deserving assistant manager pulls money out of our tip jars to help someone pay for their drink. yes, he just looooves to go fishing around for the odd quarter and dime so some spoiled housewife doesn't have to ruin her manicure by picking out change from the bottom of her louis vuitton bag.
what's really sad is mr. non-deserving would rather get a smile and thank you from a collagen and botox injected woman rather than have the respect of his baristas. when we let him know that taking money out of the tip jar is decidedly un-kosher, he just laughs it off and says "gee guys, it was only thirty cents!" then proceeds to do the very same thing ten minutes later.
mr. non-deserving is already on thin ice. you'd think he'd be smart enough to leave hit mitts off our cash.
barista rant: i know it's hot. i know you're thirsty. i know that you'd love a glass of water to go with your ice cream/smoothie/bagel that you got from some other store in my shopping center. so why the hell do you come to me while i'm at bar making a billion drinks and ask me for water? why do you feel it's perfectly ok to demand water from bux when you haven't even spent a dime? and you expect all my PAYING customers to wait for their drinks while i snap to attention and fetch your water. i'm sorry dude, but you are not my top priority.
hmm, what could something so small, yet so rage inducing be? well, i'll tell ya: it involves my non-deserving assistant manager and cash.
mr. non-deserving is a nice guy, truly he is. in fact he's so nice that he likes to help out our customers when they're a little short on cash for their drinks. yup, this guy likes to be the bux superhero: "what? not enough pocket money for your addiction? never fear! non-deserving assistant manager is here!"
you might be wondering what is wrong with a guy who will donate some of his cash to a customer who forgot their wallet, who doesn't have enough quarters or who refuses to break a twenty. honestly, nothing is wrong with that.
what's wrong is using OTHER people's money to do it!
here's a little back info: at bux managers do not earn tips. nor are they supposed to handle, look at or think about our tips. they get big money bonuses and we get around a nickel per transaction.
that's why it's so upsetting when our non-deserving assistant manager pulls money out of our tip jars to help someone pay for their drink. yes, he just looooves to go fishing around for the odd quarter and dime so some spoiled housewife doesn't have to ruin her manicure by picking out change from the bottom of her louis vuitton bag.
what's really sad is mr. non-deserving would rather get a smile and thank you from a collagen and botox injected woman rather than have the respect of his baristas. when we let him know that taking money out of the tip jar is decidedly un-kosher, he just laughs it off and says "gee guys, it was only thirty cents!" then proceeds to do the very same thing ten minutes later.
mr. non-deserving is already on thin ice. you'd think he'd be smart enough to leave hit mitts off our cash.
barista rant: i know it's hot. i know you're thirsty. i know that you'd love a glass of water to go with your ice cream/smoothie/bagel that you got from some other store in my shopping center. so why the hell do you come to me while i'm at bar making a billion drinks and ask me for water? why do you feel it's perfectly ok to demand water from bux when you haven't even spent a dime? and you expect all my PAYING customers to wait for their drinks while i snap to attention and fetch your water. i'm sorry dude, but you are not my top priority.
6.05.2006
say it again - with feeling
i don't understand some of my customers. it's as if they've already decided that anyone who works at bux must be a moron or a complete imbecile (mind you, often times you will find both - but that just means they haven't been weeded out yet).
today a woman came in and handed me a post-it note.
"here, this is what i want. my friend wrote it down because i can never remember what it's called." she informed me.
the post it had the words 'tall double white mocha' written on it.
"did you want a double tall white mocha with two espresso shots or did you want a tall white mocha with double the white chocolate?" i asked her.
"what does the paper say?" she snipped.
"it says 'tall double white mocha'. i'm just looking for you to clarify what the 'double' means." i shot back - pissed that she was treating me as if i were an idiot.
she takes the post-it back from me and reads "TALL...DOUBLE...WHITE...MOCHA!" out loud. pausing in between each word, and pointing her finger in the air for emphasis.
"fine," i say through gritted teeth. "i'll get you a tall white mocha with double the syrup."
i grab a tall cup and start to mark it when she yells out "NO! not the small one. i want the TALL one!"
"you mean a venti?" i practically sneered, but her idiocy was lost on her.
"the tall one!" she yelled again and pointed to the stack of venti cups.
my fellow barista brat told me i deserved an award for not going off on the lady. i tend to agree.
partner rant: please, please, PLEASE make a proper schedule! just once, just so i know you're capable! today our orders came in - just like they do EVERY monday, and still you failed to ensure there would be a person on the clock to put away the product. what was the result? well, boxes and boxes in our tiny backroom making it very difficult to re-stock and prep. and i bet you'll start bitching tomorrow when you see they weren't magically put away by elves in the night. it is your responsibility to manage the store and that includes the schedule. we will not work off the clock so don't try short scheduling us again!
today a woman came in and handed me a post-it note.
"here, this is what i want. my friend wrote it down because i can never remember what it's called." she informed me.
the post it had the words 'tall double white mocha' written on it.
"did you want a double tall white mocha with two espresso shots or did you want a tall white mocha with double the white chocolate?" i asked her.
"what does the paper say?" she snipped.
"it says 'tall double white mocha'. i'm just looking for you to clarify what the 'double' means." i shot back - pissed that she was treating me as if i were an idiot.
she takes the post-it back from me and reads "TALL...DOUBLE...WHITE...MOCHA!" out loud. pausing in between each word, and pointing her finger in the air for emphasis.
"fine," i say through gritted teeth. "i'll get you a tall white mocha with double the syrup."
i grab a tall cup and start to mark it when she yells out "NO! not the small one. i want the TALL one!"
"you mean a venti?" i practically sneered, but her idiocy was lost on her.
"the tall one!" she yelled again and pointed to the stack of venti cups.
my fellow barista brat told me i deserved an award for not going off on the lady. i tend to agree.
partner rant: please, please, PLEASE make a proper schedule! just once, just so i know you're capable! today our orders came in - just like they do EVERY monday, and still you failed to ensure there would be a person on the clock to put away the product. what was the result? well, boxes and boxes in our tiny backroom making it very difficult to re-stock and prep. and i bet you'll start bitching tomorrow when you see they weren't magically put away by elves in the night. it is your responsibility to manage the store and that includes the schedule. we will not work off the clock so don't try short scheduling us again!
6.04.2006
the weekend makes people dumber
gems from this weekend:
- "hey which gum flavor is best? i'm gonna take some ecstasy tonight and i want something that will go well with it."
- "i need to return this espresso brownie because you didn't tell me there was coffee in it! yeah, i know it's called an espresso brownie, but how was i supposed to know it was made with coffee!"
- "you don't sell scoops of ice cream? why not? the store next door does!"
- "i heard coffee's a diuretic so i want a frappuccino without caffeine. i'm going to the movies and i don't want to have diarrhea during the film."
- "do any of your syrups act like aphrodisiacs?"
- "i spent all my money at the bagel place, but i really want a latte. can i pay you later? oh, and i want to get one for my wife and my brother. can you spot me until tomorrow?"
- "my dad owns starbucks stock. do i get a discount?"
- "i bought a pound of beans to make coffee at home, but i didn't like the way it tasted. i threw it out, but i still have the receipt. can i get my money back?"
- "what do you mean you don't have anymore gingerbread syrup? i don't care that it's summertime! you should carry it all year round!"
- "how many calories does your sugar-free vanilla have?"
partner rant: dude, you're supposed to be an assistant manager. so why do i have to fix everything you do - even the most simple of tasks. how can you be earning the big bucks and still mess up everything you touch? because of your mistake we brewed caffeinated coffee, but told our customers it was decaf. because of your stupidity two people got free drinks. because of your inability to manage time you turned over the worst shift i've ever seen. and because you're such a coward you allowed a customer to verbally abuse one of my fellow baristas. you need to be demoted. and your pay needs to be cut.
- "hey which gum flavor is best? i'm gonna take some ecstasy tonight and i want something that will go well with it."
- "i need to return this espresso brownie because you didn't tell me there was coffee in it! yeah, i know it's called an espresso brownie, but how was i supposed to know it was made with coffee!"
- "you don't sell scoops of ice cream? why not? the store next door does!"
- "i heard coffee's a diuretic so i want a frappuccino without caffeine. i'm going to the movies and i don't want to have diarrhea during the film."
- "do any of your syrups act like aphrodisiacs?"
- "i spent all my money at the bagel place, but i really want a latte. can i pay you later? oh, and i want to get one for my wife and my brother. can you spot me until tomorrow?"
- "my dad owns starbucks stock. do i get a discount?"
- "i bought a pound of beans to make coffee at home, but i didn't like the way it tasted. i threw it out, but i still have the receipt. can i get my money back?"
- "what do you mean you don't have anymore gingerbread syrup? i don't care that it's summertime! you should carry it all year round!"
- "how many calories does your sugar-free vanilla have?"
partner rant: dude, you're supposed to be an assistant manager. so why do i have to fix everything you do - even the most simple of tasks. how can you be earning the big bucks and still mess up everything you touch? because of your mistake we brewed caffeinated coffee, but told our customers it was decaf. because of your stupidity two people got free drinks. because of your inability to manage time you turned over the worst shift i've ever seen. and because you're such a coward you allowed a customer to verbally abuse one of my fellow baristas. you need to be demoted. and your pay needs to be cut.
6.03.2006
effin' friday nights!
tonight was another friday night from hell.
some of the highlights:
- remade about fifteen drinks. all because each customer asked for them "iced" when they wanted frappuccinos. and yes, each time we did indeed ask "do you want ice cubes or do you want it blended like a milkshake?" of course they insisted they wanted ice cubes only to wrinkle their noses when we presented them with their drinks. "no!" they all cried out. "i wanted the other kind. the kind that are all blended!"
- customer asked for a vanilla latte. so we made a vanilla latte. customer then tells us "oops! i wanted it with nonfat milk". so we remake a nonfat vanilla latte. customer then tells us "oops! i wanted sugar free vanilla". so we remake a nonfat sugar free vanilla latte. customer then tells us "oops! i wanted that decaf as well". she's lucky we didn't add any 'special sauce' to her drink.
- over the hill b-list actor comes in. asks for his usual drink and complains that it's always made wrong and that we need to make sure we learn how to make a proper cappuccino. fellow barista brat makes cappuccino to perfection. b-list actor bitches and says the foam is too sudsy. i remake drink - in exactly the same fashion as fellow barista brat. surprise, surprise the cappuccino is now perfect. "finally!" b-list actor exclaims. "THIS is the creamy foam i deserve!" yeah, the guy deserves something all right, but his mouth isn't the designated orifice.
partner rant: why do you insist on making my job harder?!? really, how hard is it to remember to give a customer their pastry? how hard is it to put a sleeve on a venti cup? how hard is it to remember to empty ALL the trashcans at the end of a shift? and how hard is it to DO YOUR FRIGGEN' JOB?!? apparently it's very hard because you have yet to work one shift without screwing everything up. please, if you can't hack it here - just leave. i promise, you'll be happier. i know i will.
some of the highlights:
- remade about fifteen drinks. all because each customer asked for them "iced" when they wanted frappuccinos. and yes, each time we did indeed ask "do you want ice cubes or do you want it blended like a milkshake?" of course they insisted they wanted ice cubes only to wrinkle their noses when we presented them with their drinks. "no!" they all cried out. "i wanted the other kind. the kind that are all blended!"
- customer asked for a vanilla latte. so we made a vanilla latte. customer then tells us "oops! i wanted it with nonfat milk". so we remake a nonfat vanilla latte. customer then tells us "oops! i wanted sugar free vanilla". so we remake a nonfat sugar free vanilla latte. customer then tells us "oops! i wanted that decaf as well". she's lucky we didn't add any 'special sauce' to her drink.
- over the hill b-list actor comes in. asks for his usual drink and complains that it's always made wrong and that we need to make sure we learn how to make a proper cappuccino. fellow barista brat makes cappuccino to perfection. b-list actor bitches and says the foam is too sudsy. i remake drink - in exactly the same fashion as fellow barista brat. surprise, surprise the cappuccino is now perfect. "finally!" b-list actor exclaims. "THIS is the creamy foam i deserve!" yeah, the guy deserves something all right, but his mouth isn't the designated orifice.
partner rant: why do you insist on making my job harder?!? really, how hard is it to remember to give a customer their pastry? how hard is it to put a sleeve on a venti cup? how hard is it to remember to empty ALL the trashcans at the end of a shift? and how hard is it to DO YOUR FRIGGEN' JOB?!? apparently it's very hard because you have yet to work one shift without screwing everything up. please, if you can't hack it here - just leave. i promise, you'll be happier. i know i will.
6.01.2006
you can't call me anytime
besides making drinks, prepping and cleaning up the store, we baristas also have to deal with the idiot customers who call several times throughout the day. often the calls are just to ask what our hours are, or if we accept credit cards (duh! name one bux that doesn't!) but mostly the calls are just a waste of time and annoying as all hell.
barista brat: "thank you for calling starbucks. this is brat, how can i help you?"
idiot customer: "um, what's the phone number for the bux up the street?"
in my head i respond "411" but instead i actually give the proper phone number.
bb: "thank you for calling starbucks. this is brat, how can i help you?"
ic: "yeah, how many calories are in your frappuccinos. i need to know because i'm sending one of my workers down there and i want to make sure they pick up the right thing."
in my head i tell them "if you have to ask, you shouldn't consume" but instead i actually look up the amount of calories and relay them to idiot customer.
bb: "thank you for calling starbucks. this is brat, how can i help you?"
ic: "hey - i'm at the corner of bf and egypt. how do i get to your store?"
in my head i say "my name it not mapquest" but instead i spend the next five minutes giving directions.
bb: "thank you for calling starbucks. this is brat, how can i help you?"
ic: "uh, who's this?"
bb: "this is brat."
ic: "brat? uh, i don't think i know a brat."
bb: "is there something i can help you with?"
ic: "well, maybe....."
bb: "sir, you do realize you called starbucks, don't you?"
ic: "i don't know any star, either."
bb: "i'm hanging up now."
ic: "wait, i'm supposed to order a lahteee or something. is that a lady's drink? a lahteee?"
barista rant: don't bitch and yell at me because your mother-in-law gave you a gift certificate to the mall and i won't let you cash it in at bux. "well, why not?" you screamed at me. "because we are not IN the mall." i responded flatly. "well, you're close enough to it!" was your genius reply. "yeah, we're pretty close to the gas station, too and we don't accept aarco cards, either."
i said without humor. "well, how am i supposed to pay for my drink?" you asked. "most people use cash or a credit card." you didn't like my answer, but you still shelled out the big bucks for super sugary drink.
barista brat: "thank you for calling starbucks. this is brat, how can i help you?"
idiot customer: "um, what's the phone number for the bux up the street?"
in my head i respond "411" but instead i actually give the proper phone number.
bb: "thank you for calling starbucks. this is brat, how can i help you?"
ic: "yeah, how many calories are in your frappuccinos. i need to know because i'm sending one of my workers down there and i want to make sure they pick up the right thing."
in my head i tell them "if you have to ask, you shouldn't consume" but instead i actually look up the amount of calories and relay them to idiot customer.
bb: "thank you for calling starbucks. this is brat, how can i help you?"
ic: "hey - i'm at the corner of bf and egypt. how do i get to your store?"
in my head i say "my name it not mapquest" but instead i spend the next five minutes giving directions.
bb: "thank you for calling starbucks. this is brat, how can i help you?"
ic: "uh, who's this?"
bb: "this is brat."
ic: "brat? uh, i don't think i know a brat."
bb: "is there something i can help you with?"
ic: "well, maybe....."
bb: "sir, you do realize you called starbucks, don't you?"
ic: "i don't know any star, either."
bb: "i'm hanging up now."
ic: "wait, i'm supposed to order a lahteee or something. is that a lady's drink? a lahteee?"
barista rant: don't bitch and yell at me because your mother-in-law gave you a gift certificate to the mall and i won't let you cash it in at bux. "well, why not?" you screamed at me. "because we are not IN the mall." i responded flatly. "well, you're close enough to it!" was your genius reply. "yeah, we're pretty close to the gas station, too and we don't accept aarco cards, either."
i said without humor. "well, how am i supposed to pay for my drink?" you asked. "most people use cash or a credit card." you didn't like my answer, but you still shelled out the big bucks for super sugary drink.
5.31.2006
when it's ok to hate baristas
today i scored a day off and i'm blogging from a bux i don't usually go to.
these baristas have it easy. not one customer in line and only about four of us in the lobby - all on our laptops.
so, in my bux, whenever there is down time, we stock, prep, do trash runs, clean counters, make change, and everything else that needs to be accomplished in order for our bux to successful.
want to know what the baristas are doing here?
one is leaning against the back counter, two are standing behind the pastry case talking about that "classic" film the davinci code and the other barista is doing 'the robot' to whatever song is playing right now.
yep - highly productive set, these baristas are.
these are the kind of baristas i hate. the ones that are lazy as all hell, don't give a bean about customer service, and have the audacity to deeply sigh when someone comes to the counter to order a drink.
um, hello but aren't you getting PAID to take orders and make drinks? i know that's what my fellow baristas and i are paid to do.
i also hate this type of barista because they will be the ones to screw you over for your closing shift. nothing will have been prepped or pre-closed, which means you won't get out on time because you're doing the work of the mid-shift before you - as well as your own duties.
i have no idea what sort of manager these baristas have, but they need a good apron whipping, that's for sure.
customer rant: don't friggen' argue with me about my drink! i asked for a tall roomy americano and you gave me an americano with raspberry syrup. "oh, see, they put an 'r' in the custom box, so that means raspberry," you told me. when i informed you that an 'r' in the SYRUP box means raspberry and an 'r' in the CUSTOM box means roomy, you just rolled your eyes. "that's not how we do it here." you said. um, excuse me but isn't YOUR register partner the one that marked the cup? so i guess they do indeed do it that way at your bux. well, everyone except for you, apparently.
these baristas have it easy. not one customer in line and only about four of us in the lobby - all on our laptops.
so, in my bux, whenever there is down time, we stock, prep, do trash runs, clean counters, make change, and everything else that needs to be accomplished in order for our bux to successful.
want to know what the baristas are doing here?
one is leaning against the back counter, two are standing behind the pastry case talking about that "classic" film the davinci code and the other barista is doing 'the robot' to whatever song is playing right now.
yep - highly productive set, these baristas are.
these are the kind of baristas i hate. the ones that are lazy as all hell, don't give a bean about customer service, and have the audacity to deeply sigh when someone comes to the counter to order a drink.
um, hello but aren't you getting PAID to take orders and make drinks? i know that's what my fellow baristas and i are paid to do.
i also hate this type of barista because they will be the ones to screw you over for your closing shift. nothing will have been prepped or pre-closed, which means you won't get out on time because you're doing the work of the mid-shift before you - as well as your own duties.
i have no idea what sort of manager these baristas have, but they need a good apron whipping, that's for sure.
customer rant: don't friggen' argue with me about my drink! i asked for a tall roomy americano and you gave me an americano with raspberry syrup. "oh, see, they put an 'r' in the custom box, so that means raspberry," you told me. when i informed you that an 'r' in the SYRUP box means raspberry and an 'r' in the CUSTOM box means roomy, you just rolled your eyes. "that's not how we do it here." you said. um, excuse me but isn't YOUR register partner the one that marked the cup? so i guess they do indeed do it that way at your bux. well, everyone except for you, apparently.
5.29.2006
hello, operator?
apparently my fellow barista brat and awesome assistant manager had the sunday night from hell. i think they both have temporary deafness due to the frappuccino blenders running all night long. but, admittedly, sometimes the worst nights produce the best stories.
case in point: last night's craziness made for a longer night of cleaning up. usually we bring in our outside tables and chairs about ten minutes before we lock our doors. on nights when there are still a ton of people hanging around the outside of our bux we might wait until after we've mopped the inside of the store before we bring in the outside furniture. and yes - we DO have to literally pull the chairs out from the asses sitting in them because most of our customers assume we are open for as long as they want us to be.
well, we're not.
so last night when my fellow barista brat kicked the loiterers off our patio, one of them decided to use his cell phone to call bux.
"uh, what time do you guys close?" the guy asked from right outside our locked door.
"actually, we closed almost an hour ago," my awesome assistant manager informed him.
"what time do you guys open in the morning?" the guy asked while standing right in front of our posted hours of operation.
"we will be open again at 5am."
"well, can i order a drink right now?"
"we're closed."
"well, i'm standing right outside." the guy said - like he was doing bux a favor.
"um, i know. i can see you."
"so, can i get a drink?" idiot guy asked again.
"sir, we're closed."
"well, doesn't starbucks have a 'just say yes' policy?"
"actually we do. but it's only in effect when we're OPEN." my awesome assistant manager let him know.
the not so funny part of this story is that the guy will probably call back later in the week to make a formal complaint with the manager. and he'll probably get a free drink out of it.
barista rant: if you're looking for a particular mug that bux used to carry it's fine to call stores and ask them if they have it in stock. but it is NOT ok to ask ME to call all the bux's in my district so you can locate your precious mug. and it's not acceptable to give me attitude when i inform you that i am too busy at the moment to rattle off the phone numbers of those stores. sorry lady, but i have a job to do and the ten customers in line get top priority over you, get it?
case in point: last night's craziness made for a longer night of cleaning up. usually we bring in our outside tables and chairs about ten minutes before we lock our doors. on nights when there are still a ton of people hanging around the outside of our bux we might wait until after we've mopped the inside of the store before we bring in the outside furniture. and yes - we DO have to literally pull the chairs out from the asses sitting in them because most of our customers assume we are open for as long as they want us to be.
well, we're not.
so last night when my fellow barista brat kicked the loiterers off our patio, one of them decided to use his cell phone to call bux.
"uh, what time do you guys close?" the guy asked from right outside our locked door.
"actually, we closed almost an hour ago," my awesome assistant manager informed him.
"what time do you guys open in the morning?" the guy asked while standing right in front of our posted hours of operation.
"we will be open again at 5am."
"well, can i order a drink right now?"
"we're closed."
"well, i'm standing right outside." the guy said - like he was doing bux a favor.
"um, i know. i can see you."
"so, can i get a drink?" idiot guy asked again.
"sir, we're closed."
"well, doesn't starbucks have a 'just say yes' policy?"
"actually we do. but it's only in effect when we're OPEN." my awesome assistant manager let him know.
the not so funny part of this story is that the guy will probably call back later in the week to make a formal complaint with the manager. and he'll probably get a free drink out of it.
barista rant: if you're looking for a particular mug that bux used to carry it's fine to call stores and ask them if they have it in stock. but it is NOT ok to ask ME to call all the bux's in my district so you can locate your precious mug. and it's not acceptable to give me attitude when i inform you that i am too busy at the moment to rattle off the phone numbers of those stores. sorry lady, but i have a job to do and the ten customers in line get top priority over you, get it?
5.28.2006
invisible friends
this weekend has been slightly less busy. i think it must have something to do with the holiday weekend.
to drum up excitement for the new banana frappuccinos we've been sampling them like mad. two straight hours out of each day are spent making about a billion tiny cups of frappuccinos to hand out to people in bux, outside of bux, in the shopping center, at the movie theatre and at the mall across the street. i guess the great minds in corporate figured our customers wouldn't be able to keep from ordering the damn things if they just got a taste of them.
well, i'm here to let them know that their marketing strategy backfired.
instead of people buying a frappuccino after taking a sample, they're just coming back for more samples. yup, they're coming back three or four times to "taste" the new drinks. and if they happen to stop by at a time when we're not sampling, we've been instructed to make samples anyway. oh joy. every ten minutes some freak comes in asking for a sample and we have to make them. all friggen' day long.
today we had a guy literally load up on samples. he drank two of them right in front of us and then grabbed SIX more.
"uh, they're for my friends outside." he said while he tried to figure out how to balance two more.
"well, your friends can come in and get their own samples." my fellow barista brat informed him.
"what?" he asked, sensing the barista was annoyed. "it's not like you're not going to give them all away anyway!"
"it's not like you're going to give them all away, either." i chimed in.
i hope he gets the runs from his greediness.
barista rant: just because you had the "brilliant" idea of adding blackberry sauce to your vanilla bean frappuccino doesn't mean you can talk my ear off everyday about how bux should offer your version of the drink. guess what? i'm not interested. i don't care and i'm not going to call corporate and suggest your recipe to them. nor am i going to try and sell this drink to my other customers. basically, if you want to see your drink on the menu board, then you can open you're own coffee shop.
to drum up excitement for the new banana frappuccinos we've been sampling them like mad. two straight hours out of each day are spent making about a billion tiny cups of frappuccinos to hand out to people in bux, outside of bux, in the shopping center, at the movie theatre and at the mall across the street. i guess the great minds in corporate figured our customers wouldn't be able to keep from ordering the damn things if they just got a taste of them.
well, i'm here to let them know that their marketing strategy backfired.
instead of people buying a frappuccino after taking a sample, they're just coming back for more samples. yup, they're coming back three or four times to "taste" the new drinks. and if they happen to stop by at a time when we're not sampling, we've been instructed to make samples anyway. oh joy. every ten minutes some freak comes in asking for a sample and we have to make them. all friggen' day long.
today we had a guy literally load up on samples. he drank two of them right in front of us and then grabbed SIX more.
"uh, they're for my friends outside." he said while he tried to figure out how to balance two more.
"well, your friends can come in and get their own samples." my fellow barista brat informed him.
"what?" he asked, sensing the barista was annoyed. "it's not like you're not going to give them all away anyway!"
"it's not like you're going to give them all away, either." i chimed in.
i hope he gets the runs from his greediness.
barista rant: just because you had the "brilliant" idea of adding blackberry sauce to your vanilla bean frappuccino doesn't mean you can talk my ear off everyday about how bux should offer your version of the drink. guess what? i'm not interested. i don't care and i'm not going to call corporate and suggest your recipe to them. nor am i going to try and sell this drink to my other customers. basically, if you want to see your drink on the menu board, then you can open you're own coffee shop.
5.27.2006
want some sugar, sugar?
we have this regular customer who is very nice, but very odd as well.
miles orders a grande drip with room everyday - sometimes two or three times - sits at a table and people watches for hours. what makes him a little odd is that he always has a goofy smile on his face while he watches the customers in my bux.
one day while i was doing a trash run, i saw miles put a note on someone's car in the parking lot, then run away before he got caught. i thought it strange but quickly forgot about it.
that is - until one of my loyal customers came in and asked me about miles.
"who is that guy that sits here and smiles at everyone?" she asked.
"oh, that's miles. he's here everyday." i told her.
"well, yesterday i found a note on my car, stating that i smiled at him when i walked into bux, that he thinks i'm gorgeous and he wanted to know if i was single. he even left his phone number."
a couple days after that ANOTHER loyal customer came in telling me the same thing. but the funny thing was he had left the exact same note on her car a year earlier at a different bux. it seems miles likes the ladies. and he likes to leave notes. and apparently it worked because last night he came in with his girlfriend.
mind you - at first we all thought it was his mother because of the age difference, but i'm pretty sure no one kisses their mother with tongue. at least not in public.
i guess the lesson here is persistence pays off. either that or beware of smiling coffee drinkers.
partner rant: don't say "i'm sorry! i apologize!" when i ask you to do something correctly. hey foolio - i'm not looking for an apology - i'm looking for you to do things the right way. if you're getting tired of me telling you the standard way to write cups, make drinks, etc. - then do them correctly in the first place and you'll never hear a peep out of me. but if you continue to screw things up, you can bet your tip money that i will be right there to point you in the right direction. your choice.
miles orders a grande drip with room everyday - sometimes two or three times - sits at a table and people watches for hours. what makes him a little odd is that he always has a goofy smile on his face while he watches the customers in my bux.
one day while i was doing a trash run, i saw miles put a note on someone's car in the parking lot, then run away before he got caught. i thought it strange but quickly forgot about it.
that is - until one of my loyal customers came in and asked me about miles.
"who is that guy that sits here and smiles at everyone?" she asked.
"oh, that's miles. he's here everyday." i told her.
"well, yesterday i found a note on my car, stating that i smiled at him when i walked into bux, that he thinks i'm gorgeous and he wanted to know if i was single. he even left his phone number."
a couple days after that ANOTHER loyal customer came in telling me the same thing. but the funny thing was he had left the exact same note on her car a year earlier at a different bux. it seems miles likes the ladies. and he likes to leave notes. and apparently it worked because last night he came in with his girlfriend.
mind you - at first we all thought it was his mother because of the age difference, but i'm pretty sure no one kisses their mother with tongue. at least not in public.
i guess the lesson here is persistence pays off. either that or beware of smiling coffee drinkers.
partner rant: don't say "i'm sorry! i apologize!" when i ask you to do something correctly. hey foolio - i'm not looking for an apology - i'm looking for you to do things the right way. if you're getting tired of me telling you the standard way to write cups, make drinks, etc. - then do them correctly in the first place and you'll never hear a peep out of me. but if you continue to screw things up, you can bet your tip money that i will be right there to point you in the right direction. your choice.
5.26.2006
understaffed blues
today is friday and i have no idea what kind of shift i'm in for tonight.
once upon a time i had the world's best manager and i never had to look at my schedule with concern. she always set me up with great people, scheduled shifts properly so we could all take breaks in a timely manner, and always listened to her partners. not only that - she was great at interviewing and hiring solid people.
so, when she was my manager (well, actually in my heart of hearts she still is) i never dreaded going in to work. not even on friday night when i knew it would be insanely busy. unfortunately that is no longer the case.
my current manager means well, i'm sure - but she is hardly seasoned (imho). she's an outstanding barista, but her scheduling needs A LOT of help. what's really sad is she doesn't seem to listen when her partners point out the days when we are understaffed.
not listening + overworked baristas = requests for transfers and two-week notices.
not even my awesome assistant manager can get through to our current manager, and i've heard her try on several occasions.
not only that, she doesn't hold the slackers accountable for anything although she expects 200% from her seasoned baristas. yeah, not exactly fair. it would be easier to dislike her if she were an awful person, but she's actually very nice and personable. she just can't handle managing a high volume store.
it's sad when you can list off at least five baristas that are ready to jump ship because all they hear is "upsale! cut hours! BANANAS! send him home early!". then at the end of the week we are told "hey, don't cut so much labor that you're hurting for bodies during the weekend". um, hello?
i myself have decided to change where i hang my apron. wish i could go to my former manager's store, but unfortunately they're all chalked up.
barista rant: why do you point to the menu board and ask "is that any good?". do you really not realize that from where i'm standing i CANNOT see the menu? that even if i could i would not be able to discern which drink you are pointing to? and that "good" is totally subjective? did you know that i'm not a mind reader? i'd be happy to give you my opinion of any drink, so long as you actually let me know which one you are interested in. is that too much to ask?
once upon a time i had the world's best manager and i never had to look at my schedule with concern. she always set me up with great people, scheduled shifts properly so we could all take breaks in a timely manner, and always listened to her partners. not only that - she was great at interviewing and hiring solid people.
so, when she was my manager (well, actually in my heart of hearts she still is) i never dreaded going in to work. not even on friday night when i knew it would be insanely busy. unfortunately that is no longer the case.
my current manager means well, i'm sure - but she is hardly seasoned (imho). she's an outstanding barista, but her scheduling needs A LOT of help. what's really sad is she doesn't seem to listen when her partners point out the days when we are understaffed.
not listening + overworked baristas = requests for transfers and two-week notices.
not even my awesome assistant manager can get through to our current manager, and i've heard her try on several occasions.
not only that, she doesn't hold the slackers accountable for anything although she expects 200% from her seasoned baristas. yeah, not exactly fair. it would be easier to dislike her if she were an awful person, but she's actually very nice and personable. she just can't handle managing a high volume store.
it's sad when you can list off at least five baristas that are ready to jump ship because all they hear is "upsale! cut hours! BANANAS! send him home early!". then at the end of the week we are told "hey, don't cut so much labor that you're hurting for bodies during the weekend". um, hello?
i myself have decided to change where i hang my apron. wish i could go to my former manager's store, but unfortunately they're all chalked up.
barista rant: why do you point to the menu board and ask "is that any good?". do you really not realize that from where i'm standing i CANNOT see the menu? that even if i could i would not be able to discern which drink you are pointing to? and that "good" is totally subjective? did you know that i'm not a mind reader? i'd be happy to give you my opinion of any drink, so long as you actually let me know which one you are interested in. is that too much to ask?
5.25.2006
who's on first
you won't believe it, but yesterday we had yet ANOTHER customer grabbing someone else's drink!
it was during a rush and i was marking cups for the register baristas. a customer ordered her drink and gave me her name - jen. then the next customer gave her order and her name also was jen.
"what's your last initial because we have another jen lined up." i said.
"oh, my last name starts with an 'h'". she replied.
"ok, you're 'jen h.'" i confirmed.
two customers later we had yet another jen. i asked for her last initial and it was 'p'.
so, there were drinks for jen, jen h, and jen p.
fast forward three minutes and i hear a customer yelling over at the bar.
"what the hell! i ordered a venti, not a tall!" one of the jen's was complaining to the barista.
"oh my god, i can't believe that girl gave me the wrong size AND put the wrong initial down! i told her 'p'! not 'h'!"
"um, i'm jen h." jen #2 piped up. "that's actually my drink."
"no!" jen p yelled again. "that girl specifically asked for my last initial and i TOLD her!"
the barista then gave jen p her drink and it was a full ten seconds before she realized that she was the idiot, not me. no apology to jen h, just an "oh, i figured that girl got it all wrong" before she sauntered out the door.
grr.
partner rant: don't lie to me! don't pretend that a barista called in sick one hour before his shift when he actually let you know two days earlier that he couldn't come in! don't tell me that there was no time to find coverage when you had TWO days! did you think i wouldn't find out that you screwed my closing shift over? did you think i wouldn't find out that you dropped the ball? dude, please don't insult my intelligence, ok?
it was during a rush and i was marking cups for the register baristas. a customer ordered her drink and gave me her name - jen. then the next customer gave her order and her name also was jen.
"what's your last initial because we have another jen lined up." i said.
"oh, my last name starts with an 'h'". she replied.
"ok, you're 'jen h.'" i confirmed.
two customers later we had yet another jen. i asked for her last initial and it was 'p'.
so, there were drinks for jen, jen h, and jen p.
fast forward three minutes and i hear a customer yelling over at the bar.
"what the hell! i ordered a venti, not a tall!" one of the jen's was complaining to the barista.
"oh my god, i can't believe that girl gave me the wrong size AND put the wrong initial down! i told her 'p'! not 'h'!"
"um, i'm jen h." jen #2 piped up. "that's actually my drink."
"no!" jen p yelled again. "that girl specifically asked for my last initial and i TOLD her!"
the barista then gave jen p her drink and it was a full ten seconds before she realized that she was the idiot, not me. no apology to jen h, just an "oh, i figured that girl got it all wrong" before she sauntered out the door.
grr.
partner rant: don't lie to me! don't pretend that a barista called in sick one hour before his shift when he actually let you know two days earlier that he couldn't come in! don't tell me that there was no time to find coverage when you had TWO days! did you think i wouldn't find out that you screwed my closing shift over? did you think i wouldn't find out that you dropped the ball? dude, please don't insult my intelligence, ok?
5.23.2006
i want your bux
to expound upon yesterday's barista rant, i'm offering a few more examples of when customers take drinks that don't belong to them.
incident #1
a woman ordered two white mochas - one for her and one for her mother. the barista called out the drink five times and waited fifteen minutes before dumping the them down the drain. about ten minutes later the woman walks up to the bar demanding to know why her drinks weren't ready yet. the barista explained that he believed the drinks to be abandoned, but was happy to remake them for her. again, she neglected to pick up the drinks when he called them out. by the time she got around to taking her drinks, there were two other drinks on the bar for two other people. of course she grabbed the wrong ones and took them back to her table. it was her mother who had to inform her that they weren't drinking white mochas (dumb lady didn't even notice!). she again comes back to the bar and yells at the barista for making the wrong drinks. when he pointed out that she had TAKEN the incorrect drinks - drinks that had other people's NAMES on them she gave him a dirty look and hissed "this is YOUR fault" before finally taking the drinks that had been remade for her.
incident #2
a woman ordered a mocha frappuccino. when I called out a mocha she grabbed it. it took her two whole sips before she realized the beverage in her hand was hot - and not iced blended. she came back to the bar, informing me that i made the drink incorrectly, that she had ordered a mocha frappuccino.
"is your name susan?" i asked her.
"yes," she responded with attitude.
"well, your mocha frappuccino is right in front of you. the drink in your hand belongs to someone else."
instead of apologizing, or even looking sheepish, she just placed the hot mocha on the bar and said "well, i only took two sips. they won't notice." before grabbing her frappuccino and walking out the door.
incident #3
a regular customer brought in her personal mug for her latte. when i called out her drink a man grabbed it and walked off. i literally had to chase him down and knock on his car window to let him know he had taken someone's personal mug, not his drink which came in the usual paper starbucks cup. how could this man not realize the plastic to-go mug that said "world's best mom" wasn't his?!?
partner rant: hello! put the damn caps back on the sharpies! you know that we use the sharpies to mark every cup. you know what a pain it is when a sharpie goes missing, or is totally dried out. so why the hell can't you put the cap back on before you leave your register to do a lobby? why is it so hard to put the cap back on when there's no one else in line? do you think it's there for decoration? do you really not understand that no cap means a dried out pen?
incident #1
a woman ordered two white mochas - one for her and one for her mother. the barista called out the drink five times and waited fifteen minutes before dumping the them down the drain. about ten minutes later the woman walks up to the bar demanding to know why her drinks weren't ready yet. the barista explained that he believed the drinks to be abandoned, but was happy to remake them for her. again, she neglected to pick up the drinks when he called them out. by the time she got around to taking her drinks, there were two other drinks on the bar for two other people. of course she grabbed the wrong ones and took them back to her table. it was her mother who had to inform her that they weren't drinking white mochas (dumb lady didn't even notice!). she again comes back to the bar and yells at the barista for making the wrong drinks. when he pointed out that she had TAKEN the incorrect drinks - drinks that had other people's NAMES on them she gave him a dirty look and hissed "this is YOUR fault" before finally taking the drinks that had been remade for her.
incident #2
a woman ordered a mocha frappuccino. when I called out a mocha she grabbed it. it took her two whole sips before she realized the beverage in her hand was hot - and not iced blended. she came back to the bar, informing me that i made the drink incorrectly, that she had ordered a mocha frappuccino.
"is your name susan?" i asked her.
"yes," she responded with attitude.
"well, your mocha frappuccino is right in front of you. the drink in your hand belongs to someone else."
instead of apologizing, or even looking sheepish, she just placed the hot mocha on the bar and said "well, i only took two sips. they won't notice." before grabbing her frappuccino and walking out the door.
incident #3
a regular customer brought in her personal mug for her latte. when i called out her drink a man grabbed it and walked off. i literally had to chase him down and knock on his car window to let him know he had taken someone's personal mug, not his drink which came in the usual paper starbucks cup. how could this man not realize the plastic to-go mug that said "world's best mom" wasn't his?!?
partner rant: hello! put the damn caps back on the sharpies! you know that we use the sharpies to mark every cup. you know what a pain it is when a sharpie goes missing, or is totally dried out. so why the hell can't you put the cap back on before you leave your register to do a lobby? why is it so hard to put the cap back on when there's no one else in line? do you think it's there for decoration? do you really not understand that no cap means a dried out pen?
5.22.2006
newbie knows worst
today i visited a bux i used to frequent quite often. it used to be my favorite bux to hang at because the partners were really cool and the store was always clean. the reason i don't go there so often anymore is because there is hardly any seating available. they have become super, super busy.
i saw a couple familiar baristas and chatted with them a bit. i could sense they were annoyed - and it wasn't too hard to figure out why. of the six baristas on the floor, four of them were new.
i know the pain of working with newbies. i don't want to imagine what it would be like to deal with four of them during a busy morning rush.
the lead barista was working on bar. she was doing a fantastic job until a newbie showed up to "help" her. not only did newbie get the drinks out of order - she started to pull shots before her milk was steamed (a cardinal sin for baristas). newbie put too much foam in a latte and when the lead barista asked her to take off the excess foam and add milk, newbie scraped off the foam and plopped it into the steamed milk pitcher instead of the dipwell. then newbie pulled regular shots for a decaf drink, resteamed nonfat milk (eww!), put too many pumps of syrup in an easy vanilla cappuccino, as well as pissing off the lead barista.
i hate newbies that don't listen/learn and i know the lead barista at this store does too.
they ended up sending newbie home early because she was hindering the flow - not helping.
barista rant: LISTEN for your drink. don't just assume that any drink i put on the bar belongs to you. don't sip the drink (that wasn't even yours), wrinkle your nose and tell me that i made your mocha wrong. the reason it tastes funny is because a) it's not a mocha and b) it's not YOURS! listen for your name - that will ensure you get the drink you ordered and paid for, ok?
i saw a couple familiar baristas and chatted with them a bit. i could sense they were annoyed - and it wasn't too hard to figure out why. of the six baristas on the floor, four of them were new.
i know the pain of working with newbies. i don't want to imagine what it would be like to deal with four of them during a busy morning rush.
the lead barista was working on bar. she was doing a fantastic job until a newbie showed up to "help" her. not only did newbie get the drinks out of order - she started to pull shots before her milk was steamed (a cardinal sin for baristas). newbie put too much foam in a latte and when the lead barista asked her to take off the excess foam and add milk, newbie scraped off the foam and plopped it into the steamed milk pitcher instead of the dipwell. then newbie pulled regular shots for a decaf drink, resteamed nonfat milk (eww!), put too many pumps of syrup in an easy vanilla cappuccino, as well as pissing off the lead barista.
i hate newbies that don't listen/learn and i know the lead barista at this store does too.
they ended up sending newbie home early because she was hindering the flow - not helping.
barista rant: LISTEN for your drink. don't just assume that any drink i put on the bar belongs to you. don't sip the drink (that wasn't even yours), wrinkle your nose and tell me that i made your mocha wrong. the reason it tastes funny is because a) it's not a mocha and b) it's not YOURS! listen for your name - that will ensure you get the drink you ordered and paid for, ok?
5.21.2006
toe-may-toe, toe-mah-toe
my awesome assistant manager had an incident with a know-it-all fifteen year-old yesterday.
awesome assistant manager: "brittney, here's your tall white mocha frappuccino and your grande caramel frappuccino."
know-it-all teen: "this isn't what i asked for! i wanted a white CHOCOLATE frappuccino. not mocha!"
aam: "yes, that frappuccino has white chocolate."
teen: "YOU said white MOCHA. i don't want MOCHA, i want WHITE chocolate."
aam: "a white mocha frappuccino has white chocolate in it."
teen: "oh my GOD! i can't believe you work here and don't know the difference between white chocolate and mocha!"
aam: "mocha just means there's coffee in the drink. if you want a white chocolate frappuccino it won't have any coffee. it will taste like a milkshake instead."
teen: "no! MOCHA is the brown chocolate. WHITE chocolate is WHITE! i want WHITE chocolate, not brown MOCHA!"
aam: "look, no matter what you call the drink, the fact is this drink is made with coffee and white chocolate, therefore it's called a white mocha frappuccino."
teen: "i want to talk to the manager."
aam: "fine, just a second."
awesome assistant manager walks away then walks right back.
aam: "hi."
teen: "YOU'RE the MANAGER?"
aam: "yes."
teen: "well i want -"
aam: "yeah, i know WHITE chocolate."
i wish i could say this sort of thing happens only once in a while.
unfortunately i can't.
barista rant: do you not see me making drinks? can you not tell that i am very occupied steaming milk and pulling shots? don't you see the ten people waiting for their beverages? so why do you waltz over to the serving counter and tell me that you need forks and knives? am i anywhere near the pastry case? did i hand you food? no! don't ask the person making drinks for utensils, ok? because in order to get them for you i have to walk away from the bar and all the drinks waiting to be made. so, here's a suggestion: why not ask the person who actually handed you the coffee cake for a fork. and if you really want to look astute, try asking for the fork while you order the pastry, ok smartie?
awesome assistant manager: "brittney, here's your tall white mocha frappuccino and your grande caramel frappuccino."
know-it-all teen: "this isn't what i asked for! i wanted a white CHOCOLATE frappuccino. not mocha!"
aam: "yes, that frappuccino has white chocolate."
teen: "YOU said white MOCHA. i don't want MOCHA, i want WHITE chocolate."
aam: "a white mocha frappuccino has white chocolate in it."
teen: "oh my GOD! i can't believe you work here and don't know the difference between white chocolate and mocha!"
aam: "mocha just means there's coffee in the drink. if you want a white chocolate frappuccino it won't have any coffee. it will taste like a milkshake instead."
teen: "no! MOCHA is the brown chocolate. WHITE chocolate is WHITE! i want WHITE chocolate, not brown MOCHA!"
aam: "look, no matter what you call the drink, the fact is this drink is made with coffee and white chocolate, therefore it's called a white mocha frappuccino."
teen: "i want to talk to the manager."
aam: "fine, just a second."
awesome assistant manager walks away then walks right back.
aam: "hi."
teen: "YOU'RE the MANAGER?"
aam: "yes."
teen: "well i want -"
aam: "yeah, i know WHITE chocolate."
i wish i could say this sort of thing happens only once in a while.
unfortunately i can't.
barista rant: do you not see me making drinks? can you not tell that i am very occupied steaming milk and pulling shots? don't you see the ten people waiting for their beverages? so why do you waltz over to the serving counter and tell me that you need forks and knives? am i anywhere near the pastry case? did i hand you food? no! don't ask the person making drinks for utensils, ok? because in order to get them for you i have to walk away from the bar and all the drinks waiting to be made. so, here's a suggestion: why not ask the person who actually handed you the coffee cake for a fork. and if you really want to look astute, try asking for the fork while you order the pastry, ok smartie?
5.20.2006
bananaramadrama
i am absolutely dreading going in to work tonight. i know it's just going to be a repeat performance of last night: a billion customers going to/coming from the da vinci code and ordering twice as many frappuccinos. ugh.
i've ranted several times about frappuccinos, but ever since we've added banana and coconut it's gotten even worse (if you could imagine). the problem with the banana is that it can (and is) incorporated into any type of existing frappuccino. before, in a line of ten blended drinks, you would usually have about three caramels, two java chips, two mochas, a vanilla bean, a plain coffee and a strawberries and cream.
believe me, that was bad enough.
now it's a banana coconut, caramel, banana caramel, strawberries and banana, mocha, banana mocha, mocha coconut with banana, banana creme, double chocolate chip with banana, yadda, yadda, yadda.
every frappuccino is different with a different topping which means it takes even longer to prepare and serve them - which in turn means angrier customers.
i actually feel sorry for the customer who tries to give me attitude tonight. i'm already at my limit with the billion different blended drinks bux now offers, all i need is some idiot with complex to say the wrong thing to turn me into vesuvius.
can't wait!
partner rant: as if the stinkin' banana frappuccinos weren't bad enough! now you're forcing me to listen to the dixie chicks while i work my shift. what are you doing?!? do you WANT me to go postal? do you WANT me to scream with frustration at the noise you impose on me? whatever happened to the good old days when you played madness, morcheeba, mc solaar, manu chao and bob marley? i even loved the classical cd's! but ever since you decided to be best friends with alanis morissette, the music sucks. i hate you hear music. i hate you.
i've ranted several times about frappuccinos, but ever since we've added banana and coconut it's gotten even worse (if you could imagine). the problem with the banana is that it can (and is) incorporated into any type of existing frappuccino. before, in a line of ten blended drinks, you would usually have about three caramels, two java chips, two mochas, a vanilla bean, a plain coffee and a strawberries and cream.
believe me, that was bad enough.
now it's a banana coconut, caramel, banana caramel, strawberries and banana, mocha, banana mocha, mocha coconut with banana, banana creme, double chocolate chip with banana, yadda, yadda, yadda.
every frappuccino is different with a different topping which means it takes even longer to prepare and serve them - which in turn means angrier customers.
i actually feel sorry for the customer who tries to give me attitude tonight. i'm already at my limit with the billion different blended drinks bux now offers, all i need is some idiot with complex to say the wrong thing to turn me into vesuvius.
can't wait!
partner rant: as if the stinkin' banana frappuccinos weren't bad enough! now you're forcing me to listen to the dixie chicks while i work my shift. what are you doing?!? do you WANT me to go postal? do you WANT me to scream with frustration at the noise you impose on me? whatever happened to the good old days when you played madness, morcheeba, mc solaar, manu chao and bob marley? i even loved the classical cd's! but ever since you decided to be best friends with alanis morissette, the music sucks. i hate you hear music. i hate you.
5.18.2006
sue happy people
thankfully i only hear the phrase "i'm gonna sue starbucks!" about once a month.
of course, each time i hear this i just roll my eyes. kind of useless to sue a multi-million corporation when you're the one at fault.
the first time someone threatened to sue my bux was after an older man burned himself. the idiot refused the drink tray i offered him and instead attempted to carry four lattes by himself to the table where his family was seated. his method was hugging all four drinks to his chest, which only resulted in two of the lids popping off and the hot liquid spilling on to his chest. immediately we gave him towels to clean himself up as well as a gel salve to help cool down burns. i filled out an incident report to send to the corporate office, all the while he and his family were threatening to sue us.
excuse me?
of course nothing ever came of this because the whole thing was obviously the guy's fault. but it still was annoying to hear them threaten legal action because of his stupidity.
just recently we had a woman threaten to sue, as well as charge us the cost of cleaning her vehicle because her raspberry latte stained her carseat. this woman didn't even place her drink in a cup holder. instead she just sat it on the passenger seat because it was "easier to reach". when she made a sharp turn her drink fell on it's side and some of it leaked out of the lid (you know - the hole people drink from). well, i guess the raspberry syrup didn't go so well with her beige interior because she wanted to sue. what a genius.
and then there's the father who wanted to sue us because his daughter doesn't know how to drink from a cup and spilled her kid's cocoa all over her nice cashmere sweater. who buys cashmere for a kid? of course he felt his daughter's inability to intake beverages was the fault of bux. when he realized screaming about dry-cleaning bills was getting him nowhere, he then changed tactics and asked for ten free drink coupons. uh, no.
can't wait to hear what the next "lawsuit" will be.
customer rant: your store is a pigsty! i can't believe how messy you guys are! i came in to order a drink but after seeing how dirty your counters are, how filthy your milk pitchers look, and how all the trashcans are overflowing i walk right out. i'm sure i'm not the only customer to do so. please, maintain the standard, ok?
of course, each time i hear this i just roll my eyes. kind of useless to sue a multi-million corporation when you're the one at fault.
the first time someone threatened to sue my bux was after an older man burned himself. the idiot refused the drink tray i offered him and instead attempted to carry four lattes by himself to the table where his family was seated. his method was hugging all four drinks to his chest, which only resulted in two of the lids popping off and the hot liquid spilling on to his chest. immediately we gave him towels to clean himself up as well as a gel salve to help cool down burns. i filled out an incident report to send to the corporate office, all the while he and his family were threatening to sue us.
excuse me?
of course nothing ever came of this because the whole thing was obviously the guy's fault. but it still was annoying to hear them threaten legal action because of his stupidity.
just recently we had a woman threaten to sue, as well as charge us the cost of cleaning her vehicle because her raspberry latte stained her carseat. this woman didn't even place her drink in a cup holder. instead she just sat it on the passenger seat because it was "easier to reach". when she made a sharp turn her drink fell on it's side and some of it leaked out of the lid (you know - the hole people drink from). well, i guess the raspberry syrup didn't go so well with her beige interior because she wanted to sue. what a genius.
and then there's the father who wanted to sue us because his daughter doesn't know how to drink from a cup and spilled her kid's cocoa all over her nice cashmere sweater. who buys cashmere for a kid? of course he felt his daughter's inability to intake beverages was the fault of bux. when he realized screaming about dry-cleaning bills was getting him nowhere, he then changed tactics and asked for ten free drink coupons. uh, no.
can't wait to hear what the next "lawsuit" will be.
customer rant: your store is a pigsty! i can't believe how messy you guys are! i came in to order a drink but after seeing how dirty your counters are, how filthy your milk pitchers look, and how all the trashcans are overflowing i walk right out. i'm sure i'm not the only customer to do so. please, maintain the standard, ok?
5.17.2006
when getting lei'd is bad
have any of you been in a bux today?
of course there's been a change-over to promote our new banana frappuccinos - but really, did bux have to go with the surfer/hawaiian motif? it looks like we're using all the rejected 'old navy' signage. truly unappetizing, and not at all what we should be going for (imho). we already sell a billion frappuccinos so it's not like we really have to market/whore ourselves out to the little mall trolls. do we?
my manager had the "brilliant" idea of doing a banana cheer everytime someone orders a friggen' banana frappuccino. she wants us to get all 'harujuku girls' and scream out B-A-N-A-N-A-S before we start blending those horrid drinks. thank goodness she didn't ask to borrow the banana suit from the smoothie people next door - but we will have to wear a giant yellow visor while we trudge through the shopping center sampling the new drinks.
the bux near me is forcing their baristas to wear hawaiian shirts, leis and grass skirts. let me just say "i wouldn't be caught dead..." it's sad to see their little faces with forced smiles, asking everyone if they'd like to try the new frappuccinos, then waddle away with their plastic skirt swishing behind them. not pretty on a 6'4" 270 pound guy, i assure you.
hopefully our next change-over will reflect what bux is truly about: pseudo intellectual middle-class snobbery.
i can at least handle that.
partner rant: yes, i know i asked for a 'tall roomy americano'. so why the hell did you leave my cup filled only half way with water? roomy doesn't mean half full. if someone asked for a venti drip with room would you only fill it half way? no! because that would be a tall drip in a venti cup! so don't get lazy on me, ok? just give me enough room for cream and i'll be happy.
of course there's been a change-over to promote our new banana frappuccinos - but really, did bux have to go with the surfer/hawaiian motif? it looks like we're using all the rejected 'old navy' signage. truly unappetizing, and not at all what we should be going for (imho). we already sell a billion frappuccinos so it's not like we really have to market/whore ourselves out to the little mall trolls. do we?
my manager had the "brilliant" idea of doing a banana cheer everytime someone orders a friggen' banana frappuccino. she wants us to get all 'harujuku girls' and scream out B-A-N-A-N-A-S before we start blending those horrid drinks. thank goodness she didn't ask to borrow the banana suit from the smoothie people next door - but we will have to wear a giant yellow visor while we trudge through the shopping center sampling the new drinks.
the bux near me is forcing their baristas to wear hawaiian shirts, leis and grass skirts. let me just say "i wouldn't be caught dead..." it's sad to see their little faces with forced smiles, asking everyone if they'd like to try the new frappuccinos, then waddle away with their plastic skirt swishing behind them. not pretty on a 6'4" 270 pound guy, i assure you.
hopefully our next change-over will reflect what bux is truly about: pseudo intellectual middle-class snobbery.
i can at least handle that.
partner rant: yes, i know i asked for a 'tall roomy americano'. so why the hell did you leave my cup filled only half way with water? roomy doesn't mean half full. if someone asked for a venti drip with room would you only fill it half way? no! because that would be a tall drip in a venti cup! so don't get lazy on me, ok? just give me enough room for cream and i'll be happy.
5.16.2006
two for tuesday
at my bux we see all sorts of people coming in to get their coffee. many of them are repeat customers, and of those there are a couple that truly stand out.
we have this one woman who loves to touch everything. i mean EVERYTHING!
she walks into the store caressing whatever crosses her path: tables, chairs, people. whatever it might be, it gets touched. then before ordering her coffee she spends about fifteen minutes at our display, making sure all the mugs are perfectly spaced with our logo facing forward. chocolate bars must be right side up, tea boxes have to line up perfectly, and all mints must stand proudly. after perfecting the look of our merchandise, she finally decides to order her coffee.
her drink is always something easy, like a vanilla latte or a mocha, but she spends a ton of time talking to us - and touching us! she always wants to shake our hands and when she does she hangs onto it with a firm grip while her other hand caresses the forearm. so weird! after she let's go, she picks up her drink and then walks over to anyone sitting alone and tries to touch them as well. for awhile we thought she was some ocd prostitute because was always siding up to men who were sitting alone. after a visibly awkward conversation she would then offer to give the guy her phone number.
she's always very nice to us and i guess i shouldn't complain since she always retouches our displays.
we also have a guy that comes in every weekend. he's in his thirties, but is socially retarded (seriously! i'm not just being mean). for whatever reason i'm his favorite barista and he always shouts his hellos to me.
literally.
he'll walk into bux and shout "HI BRAT!" from across the store. if i happen to be in the backroom i'll hear him bellow "WHERE'S BRAT!" over and over until i make an appearance. if i managed a day off he'll shout "BRAT, YOU WEREN'T HERE YESTERDAY!"
one day he came in and noticed i had a new shorter hairdo.
"BRAT! YOU CUT YOUR HAIR!"
"yes, jeff. thanks for noticing."
"BOY YOU SURE MADE A MISTAKE!"
"you think so?"
"YEAH! YOU WERE A LOT PRETTIER WHEN YOU HAD LONGER HAIR!"
another time he was complaining about a drink some other barista made him.
"BRAT, THAT DRINK TASTED LIKE SHIT!"
"i'm sorry. i'll make you another one right now."
"REALLY! IT TASTED JUST LIKE SHIT. I HATE SHIT."
"well, hopefully this one tastes better."
"YEAH, BECAUSE I HATE SHIT!"
partner rant: why do you lie? when i sent you to do a lobby run you told me you emptied the trash, but you didn't! you said you changed the milk containers, but you didn't! you said you windexed the door, but you didn't! what, do you think i'm too stupid to notice fingerprints and overflowing trashcans? if you hate doing lobby runs, then quit!
we have this one woman who loves to touch everything. i mean EVERYTHING!
she walks into the store caressing whatever crosses her path: tables, chairs, people. whatever it might be, it gets touched. then before ordering her coffee she spends about fifteen minutes at our display, making sure all the mugs are perfectly spaced with our logo facing forward. chocolate bars must be right side up, tea boxes have to line up perfectly, and all mints must stand proudly. after perfecting the look of our merchandise, she finally decides to order her coffee.
her drink is always something easy, like a vanilla latte or a mocha, but she spends a ton of time talking to us - and touching us! she always wants to shake our hands and when she does she hangs onto it with a firm grip while her other hand caresses the forearm. so weird! after she let's go, she picks up her drink and then walks over to anyone sitting alone and tries to touch them as well. for awhile we thought she was some ocd prostitute because was always siding up to men who were sitting alone. after a visibly awkward conversation she would then offer to give the guy her phone number.
she's always very nice to us and i guess i shouldn't complain since she always retouches our displays.
we also have a guy that comes in every weekend. he's in his thirties, but is socially retarded (seriously! i'm not just being mean). for whatever reason i'm his favorite barista and he always shouts his hellos to me.
literally.
he'll walk into bux and shout "HI BRAT!" from across the store. if i happen to be in the backroom i'll hear him bellow "WHERE'S BRAT!" over and over until i make an appearance. if i managed a day off he'll shout "BRAT, YOU WEREN'T HERE YESTERDAY!"
one day he came in and noticed i had a new shorter hairdo.
"BRAT! YOU CUT YOUR HAIR!"
"yes, jeff. thanks for noticing."
"BOY YOU SURE MADE A MISTAKE!"
"you think so?"
"YEAH! YOU WERE A LOT PRETTIER WHEN YOU HAD LONGER HAIR!"
another time he was complaining about a drink some other barista made him.
"BRAT, THAT DRINK TASTED LIKE SHIT!"
"i'm sorry. i'll make you another one right now."
"REALLY! IT TASTED JUST LIKE SHIT. I HATE SHIT."
"well, hopefully this one tastes better."
"YEAH, BECAUSE I HATE SHIT!"
partner rant: why do you lie? when i sent you to do a lobby run you told me you emptied the trash, but you didn't! you said you changed the milk containers, but you didn't! you said you windexed the door, but you didn't! what, do you think i'm too stupid to notice fingerprints and overflowing trashcans? if you hate doing lobby runs, then quit!
5.14.2006
you muthah buxtah!
tonight's post will be a huge two-part rant.
partner rant: what the hell! the last three weeks you've totally understaffed us on sundays! why are there only eight people on the schedule, and yet we are open from 6am to 11pm! 17 hours of operation and only eight people staffed. do the math!
if you haven't noticed - sundays are friggen' busy! i mean reeeaaaallllyyy busy! we have the pre-church folk, the pre-garage sales folk, the post church folk, the post-brunch folks, the moms running errands, the dads coming in before golf, the kids on their way to/from the mall, the college students studying for exams, and everything in between.
and it doesn't stop. at all. all day long. so, wouldn't it make sense to schedule enough people to run the store, prep the store and clean the store instead of making the eight of us work twice as hard for the same pay?
and couldn't you have at least given us a couple extra people on mother's day? did you honestly think business would be slow on a friggen' holiday? don't you know everyone and their mother wants a frappuccino on a hot day? all week long we hear "we gotta cut hours! send people home early!" but you're doing it at the expense of service and cleanliness. not exactly what bux is supposed to be known for, eh?
barista rant: are you kidding me? you slacked on mother's day and waited until the last possible minute to get your mother a gift. then you had a brilliant idea - "mom likes coffee! i'll go to starbucks!", so you arrive at my store expecting me to become your personal shopper and create a wonderful mother's day gift bag. then you complain because it doesn't look "festive" enough. um, dude, this is bux - not friggen' barneys, ok? so don't bitch to me because the mug you wanted had a tiny scratch, and don't huff because we don't carry ribbons and bows. don't expect credit for being a "good son" when you ran into bux five minutes before meeting your mom for dinner. i'm very happy i neglected to remove the price tag from her gift which clearly shows how cheap you really are.
partner rant: what the hell! the last three weeks you've totally understaffed us on sundays! why are there only eight people on the schedule, and yet we are open from 6am to 11pm! 17 hours of operation and only eight people staffed. do the math!
if you haven't noticed - sundays are friggen' busy! i mean reeeaaaallllyyy busy! we have the pre-church folk, the pre-garage sales folk, the post church folk, the post-brunch folks, the moms running errands, the dads coming in before golf, the kids on their way to/from the mall, the college students studying for exams, and everything in between.
and it doesn't stop. at all. all day long. so, wouldn't it make sense to schedule enough people to run the store, prep the store and clean the store instead of making the eight of us work twice as hard for the same pay?
and couldn't you have at least given us a couple extra people on mother's day? did you honestly think business would be slow on a friggen' holiday? don't you know everyone and their mother wants a frappuccino on a hot day? all week long we hear "we gotta cut hours! send people home early!" but you're doing it at the expense of service and cleanliness. not exactly what bux is supposed to be known for, eh?
barista rant: are you kidding me? you slacked on mother's day and waited until the last possible minute to get your mother a gift. then you had a brilliant idea - "mom likes coffee! i'll go to starbucks!", so you arrive at my store expecting me to become your personal shopper and create a wonderful mother's day gift bag. then you complain because it doesn't look "festive" enough. um, dude, this is bux - not friggen' barneys, ok? so don't bitch to me because the mug you wanted had a tiny scratch, and don't huff because we don't carry ribbons and bows. don't expect credit for being a "good son" when you ran into bux five minutes before meeting your mom for dinner. i'm very happy i neglected to remove the price tag from her gift which clearly shows how cheap you really are.
friday night hell
just got home from a hellacious night closing.
damn you lindsey lohan and your stupid movie! thanks to you we had teen and preteen girls all night long ordering caramel frappuccinos to take with them to the movie theatre.
this is just a sampling of the customers i wished i could do bodily harm to tonight:
mr. "this just doesn't taste right" - sorry dude but i made your mocha the way i make all mochas, and none of my other customers have ever complained about it before. so i can only conclude that the problem lies with you!
mr. "this is too watery" - you claimed that you couldn't drink a frappuccino that was so liquefied so i remade it thicker only to have you then turn into mr. "this is too icey".
miss "um, my friend ordered the wrong thing for me, teehee!" - as if your waistline is really going to notice the difference between a java chip frappuccino and a java chip frappuccino light!
mrs. "i want two half caff shots! not one regular and one decaf!" - let's go back three seconds, shall we? what the hell do you think two half caff shots are made of? loosen that hausfrau bun and think it over, ok?
mr. "who's your manager?" - yeah dude, i'm really shaking in my skechers since you threatened to tell my manager that i didn't offer you a free drink because we ran out of maple scones.
miss "hello! i said herbal iced tea! not passion iced tea!" - hey bitch-in-training, before you mouth off and complain about your drink, make sure you actually have something valid to complain about. also take note that passion tea is indeed herbal tea.
and, of course, let's not forget mr. "your toilet wasn't flushing, but i really had to do number 2 anyway. sorry!"
partner rant: why the hell do you ignore me when i ask you to prep? could you not see that i was the only person on bar and i had ten drinks to make? so when i asked you for more caramel syrup and more whole milk why did you continue to call down the line? and when there was no one else in line, why did you start talking to the register barista about your "new ride"? did you forget we need milk to make drinks? did you fail to realize that you weren't doing anything useful? doofus, you're an assistant manager! please, make an effort.
damn you lindsey lohan and your stupid movie! thanks to you we had teen and preteen girls all night long ordering caramel frappuccinos to take with them to the movie theatre.
this is just a sampling of the customers i wished i could do bodily harm to tonight:
mr. "this just doesn't taste right" - sorry dude but i made your mocha the way i make all mochas, and none of my other customers have ever complained about it before. so i can only conclude that the problem lies with you!
mr. "this is too watery" - you claimed that you couldn't drink a frappuccino that was so liquefied so i remade it thicker only to have you then turn into mr. "this is too icey".
miss "um, my friend ordered the wrong thing for me, teehee!" - as if your waistline is really going to notice the difference between a java chip frappuccino and a java chip frappuccino light!
mrs. "i want two half caff shots! not one regular and one decaf!" - let's go back three seconds, shall we? what the hell do you think two half caff shots are made of? loosen that hausfrau bun and think it over, ok?
mr. "who's your manager?" - yeah dude, i'm really shaking in my skechers since you threatened to tell my manager that i didn't offer you a free drink because we ran out of maple scones.
miss "hello! i said herbal iced tea! not passion iced tea!" - hey bitch-in-training, before you mouth off and complain about your drink, make sure you actually have something valid to complain about. also take note that passion tea is indeed herbal tea.
and, of course, let's not forget mr. "your toilet wasn't flushing, but i really had to do number 2 anyway. sorry!"
partner rant: why the hell do you ignore me when i ask you to prep? could you not see that i was the only person on bar and i had ten drinks to make? so when i asked you for more caramel syrup and more whole milk why did you continue to call down the line? and when there was no one else in line, why did you start talking to the register barista about your "new ride"? did you forget we need milk to make drinks? did you fail to realize that you weren't doing anything useful? doofus, you're an assistant manager! please, make an effort.
5.12.2006
leave the drama for yo mamma
why can't people leave their drama at home?
i work with a guy that is normally a super barista buddy. he works really hard, he gets along with everyone (including customers), and you used to never have to worry about him leaving you a crappy shift.
sounds like he's got his beans in order, yes?
well - no.
barista buddy turns into super-whiny barista baby when it comes to his girlfriend. he's moody, he's listless and he's in the backroom every ten minutes trying to call her and beg for her forgiveness.
it doesn't matter that all his friends have told him this girl is no good. it doesn't matter that his managers have told him his barista baby behavior is affecting his job, and impending promotion. none of that matters because he's "in looooooove!"
now, i wouldn't normally be bitching about this except for the fact that my schedule is being directly affected because of him. whenever girlfriend puts the pressure on him, he calls out on his shifts, or gets some newbie to cover for him, thus making my job harder. or if he can't call out, he spends the whole shift acting like his dog died and is totally useless.
some might think, "well, he's going through a tough time. don't be so hard on him." but can i just let you know that when his grandmother died, when his aunt was in a coma, and when his brother was in juvie he was a real trooper. sure, he wasn't chipper but he did his job and he did it well. so why can't he leave the drama at home now like he did before?
barista rant: it's bad enough you didn't order your drink correctly, but don't yell at me when i put whipped cream on your frappuccino! so, you forgot to tell the register partner that you didn't want whip. ok. so why are you yelling? and really, can't you just stop sucking the straw when you get to the whipped cream? it's a stinking frappuccino! the whipped cream won't melt into the drink! it just moves down the inside of the cup as you inhale your frappuccino. why, when i offer to scrape the whipped cream off the top, do you give me a sour look? you're the one who didn't order correctly and now you want me to make you a whole new drink because this one has whipped cream cooties? grow up!
i work with a guy that is normally a super barista buddy. he works really hard, he gets along with everyone (including customers), and you used to never have to worry about him leaving you a crappy shift.
sounds like he's got his beans in order, yes?
well - no.
barista buddy turns into super-whiny barista baby when it comes to his girlfriend. he's moody, he's listless and he's in the backroom every ten minutes trying to call her and beg for her forgiveness.
it doesn't matter that all his friends have told him this girl is no good. it doesn't matter that his managers have told him his barista baby behavior is affecting his job, and impending promotion. none of that matters because he's "in looooooove!"
now, i wouldn't normally be bitching about this except for the fact that my schedule is being directly affected because of him. whenever girlfriend puts the pressure on him, he calls out on his shifts, or gets some newbie to cover for him, thus making my job harder. or if he can't call out, he spends the whole shift acting like his dog died and is totally useless.
some might think, "well, he's going through a tough time. don't be so hard on him." but can i just let you know that when his grandmother died, when his aunt was in a coma, and when his brother was in juvie he was a real trooper. sure, he wasn't chipper but he did his job and he did it well. so why can't he leave the drama at home now like he did before?
barista rant: it's bad enough you didn't order your drink correctly, but don't yell at me when i put whipped cream on your frappuccino! so, you forgot to tell the register partner that you didn't want whip. ok. so why are you yelling? and really, can't you just stop sucking the straw when you get to the whipped cream? it's a stinking frappuccino! the whipped cream won't melt into the drink! it just moves down the inside of the cup as you inhale your frappuccino. why, when i offer to scrape the whipped cream off the top, do you give me a sour look? you're the one who didn't order correctly and now you want me to make you a whole new drink because this one has whipped cream cooties? grow up!
5.10.2006
brewing a cup of anger
at bux, we rebrew coffee every hour. i'm not sure often coffee bean, western bagel or peet's rebrews, but we do it every hour. of course, in the morning we rebrew many times within the hour.
so when an older guy came in today and asked us how old are coffee was, i honestly told him that it had been brewed twenty minutes earlier.
"so it's going to be bitter!" he exclaimed.
"well, no. it's our house blend which is actually quite smooth." i informed him.
"miss, when coffee gets old it gets bitter. you should know that since you work here!"
"i can let you sample it if you'd like, SIR."
"can you dump out that batch and start a new one?" he asked.
"no, that would be wasting coffee. i can do a french press for you if you want a fresher batch."
"i'm not gonna drink old coffee!" he said using big head movements to emphasize his remark.
"sir, it's not old. and a french press is as fresh as you can get."
"the other starbucks rebrews their coffee every fifteen minutes!"
"i don't believe that, but if you do you can certainly get your coffee there," is what i really wanted to say to him, but instead i just informed him that all bux rebrew every hour.
he ended up leaving and bitching the whole way out, only to come back in ten minutes and order a cup of coffee. didn't the foolio realize his coffee was now ten minutes older?
i really, really hate when customers think they know my job better than i do. i hate when they spew some major BS, thinking it's fact and feeling as if they've schooled me. and i especially hate it when they pull the whole "i'm a shareholder!" card, as if every single one of my partners isn't one! hello! that's why we're called "partners"!
customer rant: you're bux needs serious help! you have three people working the drive thru and one person for the cafe. that means she not only has to ring up customers but she has to make the drinks as well. sure, that's fine and good if there's only one person in line, but today there were three people ahead of me. learn your deployment! take care of your cafe customers!
so when an older guy came in today and asked us how old are coffee was, i honestly told him that it had been brewed twenty minutes earlier.
"so it's going to be bitter!" he exclaimed.
"well, no. it's our house blend which is actually quite smooth." i informed him.
"miss, when coffee gets old it gets bitter. you should know that since you work here!"
"i can let you sample it if you'd like, SIR."
"can you dump out that batch and start a new one?" he asked.
"no, that would be wasting coffee. i can do a french press for you if you want a fresher batch."
"i'm not gonna drink old coffee!" he said using big head movements to emphasize his remark.
"sir, it's not old. and a french press is as fresh as you can get."
"the other starbucks rebrews their coffee every fifteen minutes!"
"i don't believe that, but if you do you can certainly get your coffee there," is what i really wanted to say to him, but instead i just informed him that all bux rebrew every hour.
he ended up leaving and bitching the whole way out, only to come back in ten minutes and order a cup of coffee. didn't the foolio realize his coffee was now ten minutes older?
i really, really hate when customers think they know my job better than i do. i hate when they spew some major BS, thinking it's fact and feeling as if they've schooled me. and i especially hate it when they pull the whole "i'm a shareholder!" card, as if every single one of my partners isn't one! hello! that's why we're called "partners"!
customer rant: you're bux needs serious help! you have three people working the drive thru and one person for the cafe. that means she not only has to ring up customers but she has to make the drinks as well. sure, that's fine and good if there's only one person in line, but today there were three people ahead of me. learn your deployment! take care of your cafe customers!
5.09.2006
enemy within
there's an unwritten rule between bux partners. i learned it my first week working for bux, and i've made sure to pass it along to every newbie that comes through my store.
the rule is: never, under any circumstances, does a partner go to a bux other than their own and order a frappuccino. never.
this might sound dumb, or even seem like a non-issue, but it is very, very serious indeed. baristas don't like making frappuccinos because they are time-consuming, messy and loud. of course, bux makes a huge profit off these drinks and promotes them to no end, so our shifts are spent in "frappuccino hell". once you get stuck in the frappuccino corner - you're there forever.
because we hate making the drinks, we have a code to never order one from any bux we might visit. most partners are very good about abiding by this rule. some, however, refuse to.
not only do they order blended drinks, but they customize them to the point of stupidity! one pump raspberry, two scoops java chips, half an espresso shot, whip cream on the top and bottom, caramel on the sides of the cup, half creme base and half coffee base, double blended, mocha affigato style - and all at a thirty percent discount.
my bux makes a point to remember these partners. we make a point to remember what bux they are from. we make a point to let them know that their drink is ridiculous and they should know better.
barista rant: turn your damn ipod off when ordering! don't stand there and wait 'til the song ends before giving me your order. don't sing along to the music when i ask you what size you want. don't wave me away when i tell you how much the total is. guess what? bux is not the place to audition for those itunes commercial, so shut the damn thing off!
the rule is: never, under any circumstances, does a partner go to a bux other than their own and order a frappuccino. never.
this might sound dumb, or even seem like a non-issue, but it is very, very serious indeed. baristas don't like making frappuccinos because they are time-consuming, messy and loud. of course, bux makes a huge profit off these drinks and promotes them to no end, so our shifts are spent in "frappuccino hell". once you get stuck in the frappuccino corner - you're there forever.
because we hate making the drinks, we have a code to never order one from any bux we might visit. most partners are very good about abiding by this rule. some, however, refuse to.
not only do they order blended drinks, but they customize them to the point of stupidity! one pump raspberry, two scoops java chips, half an espresso shot, whip cream on the top and bottom, caramel on the sides of the cup, half creme base and half coffee base, double blended, mocha affigato style - and all at a thirty percent discount.
my bux makes a point to remember these partners. we make a point to remember what bux they are from. we make a point to let them know that their drink is ridiculous and they should know better.
barista rant: turn your damn ipod off when ordering! don't stand there and wait 'til the song ends before giving me your order. don't sing along to the music when i ask you what size you want. don't wave me away when i tell you how much the total is. guess what? bux is not the place to audition for those itunes commercial, so shut the damn thing off!
5.08.2006
not so manic monday
fun customer stories from today:
woman walks in, stands in line, makes it to the register and when asked her order she gets a blank look and says, "what am i doing? i already had coffee! i don't want coffee now, i want a smoothie!", then walks out.
teenage boy walks up to the register and asks for a caramel frappuccino.
"what size?"
"hey joe - what size can i have?" teenage boy asks his friend.
"whatever size you want," friend replies, then pays for teenage boy's drink.
"that's nice," i said. "not all friends will pay for someone's frappuccino habit."
"well, he's my bitch," friend says. "gotta keep him happy!"
to which teenage boy screams out, "I'M NOT GAY!"
older woman orders a latte and asks for it extra hot.
"well, not super hot, but hotter than regular. but not so hot it will burn me. i want it hot, but i want to be able to drink it right away, not have to wait too long for it to cool down. just make it real hot, but not too hot, ok?"
middle aged customer flirts with male barista making frappuccinos.
"hey, when you get to mine make sure it's not too watery. i like 'em thick." she said and licked her lips. "it's a good thing i don't work here because they'd fire me for sexual harassment." she continues. "i wouldn't be able to keep my hands off your buns!"
at which point male barista went to the backroom to hide.
barista rant: did you know starbucks is not a dojo, nor a public park? so why do you come in every day and ask for a "tai chi latte"? when we tell you the proper name you just shrug your shoulders and say, "as long as it's tai chi i'm happy." next time you ask for your tai chi latte i'm going to start doing katas - reeeaaaallll sssslllloooowwww.
woman walks in, stands in line, makes it to the register and when asked her order she gets a blank look and says, "what am i doing? i already had coffee! i don't want coffee now, i want a smoothie!", then walks out.
teenage boy walks up to the register and asks for a caramel frappuccino.
"what size?"
"hey joe - what size can i have?" teenage boy asks his friend.
"whatever size you want," friend replies, then pays for teenage boy's drink.
"that's nice," i said. "not all friends will pay for someone's frappuccino habit."
"well, he's my bitch," friend says. "gotta keep him happy!"
to which teenage boy screams out, "I'M NOT GAY!"
older woman orders a latte and asks for it extra hot.
"well, not super hot, but hotter than regular. but not so hot it will burn me. i want it hot, but i want to be able to drink it right away, not have to wait too long for it to cool down. just make it real hot, but not too hot, ok?"
middle aged customer flirts with male barista making frappuccinos.
"hey, when you get to mine make sure it's not too watery. i like 'em thick." she said and licked her lips. "it's a good thing i don't work here because they'd fire me for sexual harassment." she continues. "i wouldn't be able to keep my hands off your buns!"
at which point male barista went to the backroom to hide.
barista rant: did you know starbucks is not a dojo, nor a public park? so why do you come in every day and ask for a "tai chi latte"? when we tell you the proper name you just shrug your shoulders and say, "as long as it's tai chi i'm happy." next time you ask for your tai chi latte i'm going to start doing katas - reeeaaaallll sssslllloooowwww.
5.07.2006
he loves me, he loves me not
this is the reason i'm frustrated with howard schultz tonight:
customer walks in and asks for a cold green tea.
"an iced green tea, a green tea lemonade, a green tea frappuccino, a blackberry green tea frappuccino, or an iced green tea latte?" i asked her.
".....uh....."
"ok, did you want the green tea blended like a milkshake or with ice cubes?"
"not blended. i want it iced."
"iced - ok, did you want an iced green tea latte that's made with milk or did you want it without milk?"
"um, no milk."
"all right, did you want a plain iced green tea or a green tea lemonade?"
"uh, i guess regular green tea."
"did you want that sweetened?"
"oh my god! why is this so fucking hard? i just want a cold green tea!"
remember the days when you could walk into a bux, order your drink, have it made and then leave in under three minutes? well, those days are over. now ordering your drink is harder than putting up your profile on eharmony.com! you answer all the barista's questions, but that doesn't mean you and your drink are "compatible".
this is the reason i like howard schultz tonight:
my awesome assistant manager told me tonight that since bux did so well this past fiscal year, all employees will be getting a bonus on our next paycheck. that means an extra $125 for me and my fellow barista brats. yeehaw! espresso shots are on me!
barista rant: yes, our bux is small. yes, there aren't enough tables for everyone. but that doesn't give you the right to drag a chair to the middle of the store, plant your butt in it and block access to the registers and the serving counter. nor can you put a chair in front of the bathroom door, then give attitude to everyone who asks you to move so they can relieve their bladders. and you may not put the chair directly in front of the condiment bar and use it as a makeshift table. don't throw a hissy if there isn't an empty table. you'll get no sympathy from us.
customer walks in and asks for a cold green tea.
"an iced green tea, a green tea lemonade, a green tea frappuccino, a blackberry green tea frappuccino, or an iced green tea latte?" i asked her.
".....uh....."
"ok, did you want the green tea blended like a milkshake or with ice cubes?"
"not blended. i want it iced."
"iced - ok, did you want an iced green tea latte that's made with milk or did you want it without milk?"
"um, no milk."
"all right, did you want a plain iced green tea or a green tea lemonade?"
"uh, i guess regular green tea."
"did you want that sweetened?"
"oh my god! why is this so fucking hard? i just want a cold green tea!"
remember the days when you could walk into a bux, order your drink, have it made and then leave in under three minutes? well, those days are over. now ordering your drink is harder than putting up your profile on eharmony.com! you answer all the barista's questions, but that doesn't mean you and your drink are "compatible".
this is the reason i like howard schultz tonight:
my awesome assistant manager told me tonight that since bux did so well this past fiscal year, all employees will be getting a bonus on our next paycheck. that means an extra $125 for me and my fellow barista brats. yeehaw! espresso shots are on me!
barista rant: yes, our bux is small. yes, there aren't enough tables for everyone. but that doesn't give you the right to drag a chair to the middle of the store, plant your butt in it and block access to the registers and the serving counter. nor can you put a chair in front of the bathroom door, then give attitude to everyone who asks you to move so they can relieve their bladders. and you may not put the chair directly in front of the condiment bar and use it as a makeshift table. don't throw a hissy if there isn't an empty table. you'll get no sympathy from us.
5.05.2006
please sir, may i have another
it's funny how sometimes when you put a customer in their place, they try and become your best friend.
incident #1
a customer came in and wanted a doppio macchiato in a tall cup with steamed milk and foam all the way to the top of the cup. at that point the drink is no longer a doppio macchiato but a double tall cappuccino. when i explained this to the customer she got all bent out of shape, informing me that "all the starbucks do it!" and that she "always orders it that way!".
well i let her know that this starbucks won't do it and we will charge her appropriately.
she tosses some more words at me, i volley them right back at her, and after she realizes that she won't get her way, she turns sugary sweet and lets me know she doesn't mind paying more money, she was just confused because the other stores charged her differently. then, as her drink was being made, she talked about how much she loved our bux because we make the best drinks and have the nicest baristas, yadda, yadda, yadda.
talk about bi-polar.
incident #2
customer orders an extra hot latte with no foam. she stands by the bar watching as every drink is made, then starts screaming at the barista because he was putting foam on a drink.
"dammit! i specifically said no foam! you better remake my drink from scratch!"
"ma'am, that's not your drink," i tried to tell her while she was still yelling.
"did i or did i not make it clear that i didn't want foam!"
"yes you did make it clear!" i had to raise my voice to be heard above hers. "that's why there won't be any foam on your drink when he makes it!"
"oh, i thought that was my drink," she muttered.
"is that why you were yelling?" i couldn't help it, she really pissed me off.
now everytime she comes in she's sweet as pie, always making a point to say hello to me and chat with me about some stupid subject, telling me how i'm such a hard worker and how much she loves how fast we make her drinks, blah, blah, blah.
so the moral of this story is put a bitch in her place and she will love you forever, haha.
customer rant: there were five baristas on the floor. no drinks had to be made and no one was doing prep or cleaning. so why did i have to wait at the counter for five minutes before someone even acknowledged me, mush less take my order? no apology for the delay. nothing. just a deadpan look and monotone voice when you asked me what i wanted. way to be legendary, folks.
incident #1
a customer came in and wanted a doppio macchiato in a tall cup with steamed milk and foam all the way to the top of the cup. at that point the drink is no longer a doppio macchiato but a double tall cappuccino. when i explained this to the customer she got all bent out of shape, informing me that "all the starbucks do it!" and that she "always orders it that way!".
well i let her know that this starbucks won't do it and we will charge her appropriately.
she tosses some more words at me, i volley them right back at her, and after she realizes that she won't get her way, she turns sugary sweet and lets me know she doesn't mind paying more money, she was just confused because the other stores charged her differently. then, as her drink was being made, she talked about how much she loved our bux because we make the best drinks and have the nicest baristas, yadda, yadda, yadda.
talk about bi-polar.
incident #2
customer orders an extra hot latte with no foam. she stands by the bar watching as every drink is made, then starts screaming at the barista because he was putting foam on a drink.
"dammit! i specifically said no foam! you better remake my drink from scratch!"
"ma'am, that's not your drink," i tried to tell her while she was still yelling.
"did i or did i not make it clear that i didn't want foam!"
"yes you did make it clear!" i had to raise my voice to be heard above hers. "that's why there won't be any foam on your drink when he makes it!"
"oh, i thought that was my drink," she muttered.
"is that why you were yelling?" i couldn't help it, she really pissed me off.
now everytime she comes in she's sweet as pie, always making a point to say hello to me and chat with me about some stupid subject, telling me how i'm such a hard worker and how much she loves how fast we make her drinks, blah, blah, blah.
so the moral of this story is put a bitch in her place and she will love you forever, haha.
customer rant: there were five baristas on the floor. no drinks had to be made and no one was doing prep or cleaning. so why did i have to wait at the counter for five minutes before someone even acknowledged me, mush less take my order? no apology for the delay. nothing. just a deadpan look and monotone voice when you asked me what i wanted. way to be legendary, folks.
5.04.2006
i don't speak english
just to warn you all:
bux will be selling two more new frappuccinos, both containing banana sauce, coconut syrup and stupid little coconut flakes to go on top of the whipped cream.
that scream you hear is all baristas pulling their hair out and crying uncontrollably.
why bux? why?
what's funny is that different regions have different roll out dates. from bravemonkey i found out that canada had citrus cupcakes before part of the states. and from alex i heard that london has already started their summer promo and are currently serving banana frappuccinos (but without the coconut syrup and flakes).
london is actually where i first saw the caramel creme and strawberries and creme fappuccinos - almost a year before any bux in the states made them. but my favorite london bux story is when i tried to order an iced caramel macchiato and they wouldn't let me!
"we can't make that," super hip london barista informed me.
"why not?" i asked, genuinely surprised.
"because it's not on the menu," she stated.
"uh, well you have hot caramel macchiatos on the menu."
"yes, we can make them hot but not iced." london barista seemed not to see how idiotic her statement was.
"okay, why don't you ring me up for a hot one and just make it iced?"
"because it's not on the menu." she said again.
"all right," i said, but i wasn't about to give up on the iced drink of my choice. "i'd like an iced grande three pump vanilla latte with caramel drizzle on top. can you make that?"
london barista rang me up, not even realizing they were indeed making me an iced caramel macchiato. crazy london buxters!
barista rant: why do you bring in your filthy personal mug for refills? why can't you rinse it out once in awhile? is your sense of smell gone? are you not tortured by the pungent odor of rancid milk and coagulated whipped cream like i am? next time i'm not rinsing your cup. maybe a mouthful of grossness will teach you to clean your own damn cup.
bux will be selling two more new frappuccinos, both containing banana sauce, coconut syrup and stupid little coconut flakes to go on top of the whipped cream.
that scream you hear is all baristas pulling their hair out and crying uncontrollably.
why bux? why?
what's funny is that different regions have different roll out dates. from bravemonkey i found out that canada had citrus cupcakes before part of the states. and from alex i heard that london has already started their summer promo and are currently serving banana frappuccinos (but without the coconut syrup and flakes).
london is actually where i first saw the caramel creme and strawberries and creme fappuccinos - almost a year before any bux in the states made them. but my favorite london bux story is when i tried to order an iced caramel macchiato and they wouldn't let me!
"we can't make that," super hip london barista informed me.
"why not?" i asked, genuinely surprised.
"because it's not on the menu," she stated.
"uh, well you have hot caramel macchiatos on the menu."
"yes, we can make them hot but not iced." london barista seemed not to see how idiotic her statement was.
"okay, why don't you ring me up for a hot one and just make it iced?"
"because it's not on the menu." she said again.
"all right," i said, but i wasn't about to give up on the iced drink of my choice. "i'd like an iced grande three pump vanilla latte with caramel drizzle on top. can you make that?"
london barista rang me up, not even realizing they were indeed making me an iced caramel macchiato. crazy london buxters!
barista rant: why do you bring in your filthy personal mug for refills? why can't you rinse it out once in awhile? is your sense of smell gone? are you not tortured by the pungent odor of rancid milk and coagulated whipped cream like i am? next time i'm not rinsing your cup. maybe a mouthful of grossness will teach you to clean your own damn cup.
5.03.2006
iced temper tantrum
this story comes courtesy of my local bux:
a customer came in and asked for an iced green tea. at bux the tea is brewed double strength so we add water and ice to it. we also ask customers if they would like their tea sweetened or unsweetened. this customer was very precise in how she ordered her tea: no sweetener, no water, easy ice.
that meant she was getting double strength tea and not very many ice cubes. simple, right? pretty self-explanatory.
however, customer became angry when taking her first sip of green tea the way she ordered it.
"this tastes awful! it's too strong! it's not supposed to taste like this!" she yelled at the baristas.
the baristas at my local bux tried to explain that it would taste different if ordered the regular way, but she wasn't having any of it.
"i'm not paying for this! this tastes terrible!"
so the baristas offered to brew a special cup of iced tea just for her. the only problem was it would take four minutes for the tea to steep.
"what! you're going to make me wait even longer! this store sucks! i can't believe you don't know how to make iced tea!"
so the baristas had no choice but to refund her money.
when the ex-customer left the store (still bitching, by the way) she wanted to demonstrate just how upset she was about the iced tea - so she kicked the large glass door on her way out: shattering it.
yes, this customer threw a tantrum and broke the glass door at bux. luckily it's a safety glass door, so although the glass was damaged beyond repair, it didn't come crashing down in shards. if it had i'm sure the bitch customer would have sued!
partner rant: i always set you up for success on your shifts, so why the hell don't you do it for me? nothing is prepped or cleaned which means my shift will be even harder because i'm doing the work you didn't do. and then you have the nerve to tell me it was a slow day and you were bored. bored!?! don't you know the barista motto? "if there's time to lean, there's time to clean!" learn it, love it, live it.
a customer came in and asked for an iced green tea. at bux the tea is brewed double strength so we add water and ice to it. we also ask customers if they would like their tea sweetened or unsweetened. this customer was very precise in how she ordered her tea: no sweetener, no water, easy ice.
that meant she was getting double strength tea and not very many ice cubes. simple, right? pretty self-explanatory.
however, customer became angry when taking her first sip of green tea the way she ordered it.
"this tastes awful! it's too strong! it's not supposed to taste like this!" she yelled at the baristas.
the baristas at my local bux tried to explain that it would taste different if ordered the regular way, but she wasn't having any of it.
"i'm not paying for this! this tastes terrible!"
so the baristas offered to brew a special cup of iced tea just for her. the only problem was it would take four minutes for the tea to steep.
"what! you're going to make me wait even longer! this store sucks! i can't believe you don't know how to make iced tea!"
so the baristas had no choice but to refund her money.
when the ex-customer left the store (still bitching, by the way) she wanted to demonstrate just how upset she was about the iced tea - so she kicked the large glass door on her way out: shattering it.
yes, this customer threw a tantrum and broke the glass door at bux. luckily it's a safety glass door, so although the glass was damaged beyond repair, it didn't come crashing down in shards. if it had i'm sure the bitch customer would have sued!
partner rant: i always set you up for success on your shifts, so why the hell don't you do it for me? nothing is prepped or cleaned which means my shift will be even harder because i'm doing the work you didn't do. and then you have the nerve to tell me it was a slow day and you were bored. bored!?! don't you know the barista motto? "if there's time to lean, there's time to clean!" learn it, love it, live it.
5.01.2006
you are the weakest link, good-bye!
i've ranted about an idiot partner many times before but today really takes the cake.
not only is she slow, lazy and dumber than dirt - she absolutely refuses to do her duties, even when she's reminded a hundred times per shift.
"please unload the sanitizer", "fill the whipped creams", "do a floor run" are all phrases that have to be repeated to her at least five times before she actually takes action. of course she doesn't do any of them properly and has a sour attitude to boot. she's been with bux for three stinkin' months and still doesn't know how to make a latte! basically she's collecting a paycheck for doing nil.
so today when i had to yet again remind her of her duties, she responded by leaving the floor and going to the backroom. for ten minutes. i was then informed by my manager that idiot partner was in the backroom crying because i "yelled" at her.
how drole. anyone who knows me knows that i don't yell at people. it's because i don't have to. my manager then told me that idiot partner was quitting on the spot because she was no longer comfortable in such a "hostile" environment.
that's when my manager and i did a little happy dance because idiot partner voted herself off the island.
yes - work was a little bit harder because we were short a body but it was well worth it to never have to set sight on such a dumbass again.
barista rant: yes my bux is small. yes we have cabinets in the lobby because there is no space in the backroom. yes, we know it's inconvenient when we ask you politely if we can get into the cabinet behind your chair. but seriously, it only takes about ten seconds of your time. so why the attitude? why the bitching about "not being able to enjoy a simple cup of coffee"? why the rolling of eyes and the "do you really have to do this NOW?" when we explain that napkins for the condiment bar are located just behind you. guess what? there's a bux down the street with a huge backroom and no cabinets in the lobby. why don't you go there if we "hassle" you too much?
not only is she slow, lazy and dumber than dirt - she absolutely refuses to do her duties, even when she's reminded a hundred times per shift.
"please unload the sanitizer", "fill the whipped creams", "do a floor run" are all phrases that have to be repeated to her at least five times before she actually takes action. of course she doesn't do any of them properly and has a sour attitude to boot. she's been with bux for three stinkin' months and still doesn't know how to make a latte! basically she's collecting a paycheck for doing nil.
so today when i had to yet again remind her of her duties, she responded by leaving the floor and going to the backroom. for ten minutes. i was then informed by my manager that idiot partner was in the backroom crying because i "yelled" at her.
how drole. anyone who knows me knows that i don't yell at people. it's because i don't have to. my manager then told me that idiot partner was quitting on the spot because she was no longer comfortable in such a "hostile" environment.
that's when my manager and i did a little happy dance because idiot partner voted herself off the island.
yes - work was a little bit harder because we were short a body but it was well worth it to never have to set sight on such a dumbass again.
barista rant: yes my bux is small. yes we have cabinets in the lobby because there is no space in the backroom. yes, we know it's inconvenient when we ask you politely if we can get into the cabinet behind your chair. but seriously, it only takes about ten seconds of your time. so why the attitude? why the bitching about "not being able to enjoy a simple cup of coffee"? why the rolling of eyes and the "do you really have to do this NOW?" when we explain that napkins for the condiment bar are located just behind you. guess what? there's a bux down the street with a huge backroom and no cabinets in the lobby. why don't you go there if we "hassle" you too much?
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